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The joys of non-cricketers doing cricket marketing

straw man

International Coach
Well, this is fabulous. Clearly the marketeer is well aware of Brad Haddin's escapades as a wicket keeper and has decided that the best place for a wicket keeper to be is in front of the stumps.
Is he in front of the stumps as first impressions suggest or is this an illusion, as his feet can be seen grounded behind the stumps? This forces us to examine the true nature of perception and combined with the question of whether the ball is entering or departing the scene, hints at the dual interdependency of potential and unpredictability. The wicketkeeper's ephemeral appearance and the muted tones of his form, undifferentiated from his uniform, suggests the deeper question 'does the wicketkeeper Brad Haddin really exist?'.

Well done Wellington.
 

Son Of Coco

Hall of Fame Member
Number One



Where to start with this monstrosity

Perhaps with where the artist should have started. Probably should have started by looking at a photo of a game of cricket with a silly mid on in action. That is an insanely silly mid on that they've drawn there. In fact, in this post-Phil Hughes cricket world, it might be considered foolhardy to suggest that a fielder should take their position on the pitch somewhere that they are likely to be hit by the bowler and the batsman.

Secondly, how the hell has the ball ended up where it has? Clearly not the bat with the way it's angled. Perhaps off the glove, but again it seems unlikely with the way the gloves are. Perhaps the ball has thumped off the batsman's arm.

Thirdly, the definition is crap. It isn't wrong as such, but that definition could apply to a number of fielding positions.

Fourth, the fielder (presumably Zimbabwean in his red kit, but strangely playing against a batsman in whites?) is demonstrating the "crocodile catch" method of fielding. Hardly ideal.

One position, the attention to detail on the 'silly mid-off' fielder. I like the fact that his floppy hat has been rammed down his trousers whilst he's having to take the close in fielding position.

Overall Fail Rating: C-
Quite clearly the ball has pitched about a foot short of the fielder, hit the seam, risen sharply just clipping his trouser leg and thus surprising the batsman who sees it late, he thrusts his hands forward at it in surprise and it pops up of the splice of the bat into the fielder's hands. The bowler is a left-hander bowling wide on the crease and swinging it in to the left-handed batsman.

Can't see a problem with it at all, and any captain who doesn't put someone in this position this weekend is a mug.

The only thing I would change is to have the ball cannoning into the fielder's groin and his testicle rocketing out of the top of his pants and hitting him in the face.
 
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HeathDavisSpeed

Hall of Fame Member
The only thing I would change is to have the ball cannoning into the fielder's groin and his testicle rocketing out of the top of his pants and hitting him in the face.
Good point.

I have also noticed that the batsman appears to be wearing sun-glasses. This is no doubt linked to RossTaylorsBox's observation that the match is being played in post-apocalyptia and the batsman is hoping against hope that the sunglasses will keep the nuclear fallout away from damaging his eyes.

I have also noticed that the grille on the fielder's helmet goes right up to the brim of the helmet. This seems like a good idea given how close in he's fielding, but may detract from the visibility of the ball if he's hoping to catch it.
 

Arjun

Cricketer Of The Year
Show us some more! This is incredibly hilarious! Much like someone confusing ManU with ManC in an ad somewhere in India.
 

HeathDavisSpeed

Hall of Fame Member
Show us some more! This is incredibly hilarious! Much like someone confusing ManU with ManC in an ad somewhere in India.
Next time I see a new poster, then I will. I'm a bit worried that they may have exhausted their supply of cricket terminology with only 3, unfortunately. I've got my fingers crossed that there'll be a new poster up in advance of the Wellington Quarter-Final though.
 

HeathDavisSpeed

Hall of Fame Member
Number Four

Very disappointing new entry from the Wellington marketeers. Perhaps confronted with the folly of getting non-cricketers to come up with cricket marketing campaigns, they've decided to cut their losses and reuse the previous embarrassing "Caution: Heavy Hitters [like McCallum]" poster.



However, if they think they're getting away with this one, they're mistaken. This is not a stumping, this is a picture of a wicket keeper being a prick. I also think he's probably got some depth perception issues - perhaps the keeper has only one eye. Don't get me wrong, he's taken the bails off well - if pointlessly, but why is he standing a yard outside the off stump. His right foot is completely off the cut strip. This is despite it being clear that the ball has come in over middle-and-off.

Very low marks for effort and only a marginal improvement on execution here.

Execrable.
 

Daemon

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DWTA. Wide outside off, Batsman has cleared his front foot, gone down on one knee and looked to blast it over covers. He's missed of course and the keeper has taken it outside off, used his right foot to push himself towards the stumps and taken the bails off. If anything this is their most realistic drawing.
 

HeathDavisSpeed

Hall of Fame Member
DWTA. Wide outside off, Batsman has cleared his front foot, gone down on one knee and looked to blast it over covers. He's missed of course and the keeper has taken it outside off, used his right foot to push himself towards the stumps and taken the bails off. If anything this is their most realistic drawing.
The scenario you put forward is certainly a possibility, and this is definitely their best effort yet (even though it has recycled an image already heaped with scorn). I'm still sceptical though given the angle the bails have come off at. They've gone straight up!

And either way, the keeper's still being a ****.
 

HeathDavisSpeed

Hall of Fame Member
Number Five

I suspect this is the final one that'll be produced given the last Wellington game is tomorrow.



What can I say about this one. I can kind of see how they've come up with it to be fair, but the "Howzat" portion of the poster seems to be happening in isolation. The game appears to be continuing unimpeded in the background. The wicket keeper about to receive another delivery and short leg preparing to crouch. Secondly, the appealing bowler is appealing in an unusual direction. He's well off the pitch - probably about 4 or 5 pitches across yet seems to be appealing right down the wicket. Perhaps, given there is no batsman in the picture and the bails haven't been disturbed, it is possible that the scenario is a run out with both batsman stranded in the non-striker's half and the bowler is appealing to the umpire who is square on to the stumps to judge the run out. This scenario seems a little contrived. Part of the right hand side of the stadium also appears to be in the process of being dragged into a black hole. This could prove detrimental to the game being completed.
 

Dan

Global Moderator
The scenario you put forward is certainly a possibility, and this is definitely their best effort yet (even though it has recycled an image already heaped with scorn). I'm still sceptical though given the angle the bails have come off at. They've gone straight up!

And either way, the keeper's still being a ****.
The angle of off stump suggests to me that the umpire was having some serious vision problems, given how big a gap there would be between off and middle stump. May as well try the speculative stumping appeal, considering the man in the white coat obviously has no sense of spatial awareness.
 

Shri

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Number Three

Well, this is fabulous. Clearly the marketeer is well aware of Brad Haddin's escapades as a wicket keeper and has decided that the best place for a wicket keeper to be is in front of the stumps. Secondly, what the hell is the batsman doing? He's wandered well out of his ground, jogged off about a yard outside off stump and looks as if he's trying to turn the ball into the leg side. This despite the ball being well outside leg stump. I'm assuming the ball has been delivered by a left-arm over bowler (perhaps right arm round), otherwise the keeper is probably in the wrong position. The right armer to get the ball there with that shot selection has probably released from well outside the return crease, angled across and then the ball will veer wildly down leg side for 5 wides. All in all - another cluster**** of a presentation. The keeper should be theoretically completing a regulation stumping, but his 'unorthodox' positioning will guarantee a no ball call.

Also, I'm sure they could have come up with some more common cricketing terms than 'cabbage patch'. Not very common these days. Probably should have gone with some play on 'State Highway 1' or 'Asphalt Highway'. Much more likely to be used in the commentary than this anachronistic term.
Looks like he has played a shot and the ball is moving to the leg side off the bat. WK position is ****ed up.
 
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