England all at sea

England management are in damage control today, with reports coming through that a drunken Andrew Flintoff had to be rescued at sea in the middle of the night, after his side’s six wicket loss to New Zealand.

The news comes after four England players were fined in a separate incident for staying up late at a nightclub.

“The former skipper grabbed a pedalo from a beach near the team’s 5-star Caribbean hotel at 4am after an eight-hour bender with team-mates,” reported the tabloid paper News Of The World

“He dragged it out to sea and was seen rocking it from side to side before it capsized.”

The reports at this stage are yet to be confirmed.