The Barmy Army's ceaseless support for the England team was a undoubtedly a factor in their 2-1 series victory over South Africa, but not even the most ardent of those supporters would reckon they have any influence over the players' sense of fashion. In that respect, the Beige Brigade, New Zealand's burgeoning fan club, has stolen a march on the Barmies, by challenging their heroes to grow moustaches for the team cause.
Later this month, New Zealand take on Australia in a Twenty20 international, and for the occasion, they will be kitted out in their iconic brown-and-tan uniforms that they wore during the glory days of the 1980s. The Beige Brigade, suitably chuffed at this turn of events, now want the players to complete the retro theme, and do away with their razors for a couple of weeks.
"Any player who fronts up with a real moustache on their face will get `a lot' of beer delivered to their local cricket club," said a Beige Brigade spokesman in a statement. "Facial hair was an important feature back in the halcyon days of cricket in this country, so if we're bringing back the horrendous colours of that era, why not go the whole hog?"
Among the great `tache wearers of the 1980s were such Kiwi legends as Jeremy Coney, Jeff Crowe, Ewen Chatfield and Glenn Turner, although the greatest of the lot was the incomparable Sir Richard Hadlee, in whose honour the competition has been initiated. The Beige Brigade are also offering bonus points for 80s-style perms, and a handicap system for players who might have a "low growth ability".
Stephen Fleming, who has recently taken to sporting a beard, and Chris Cairns are two men who seem certain to rise to the challenge, as would Craig McMillan if selected, for his Zapata-style nose-broom was a particularly fine effort during last summer's Test series in England.
One potential waverer, however, is Jeff Wilson, the former All Black legend who looks set to take on the Aussies as he makes his comeback in cricket. "Just take a look at my forehead, I'm not that good at growing hair," he told The Southland Times. "Some of the other boys in the team will be pretty keen to have a crack, I'm sure."
