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Ashes predictions

eleven

Cricket Spectator
Reckon weve got a dead cert for the banning......new poster "eleven". 3 posts in and making homophobic jibes.

Lock him in to not last till Thursday.
Thanks for the vote. I'll be at the gabba then and probably quite inebriated so there's a chance.

Describing what a bunch of Australian tools are likely to say to Punchy McPunchyface when/if he turns up in Australia is not a homophobic jibe as much as an pretty accurate prediction if I know my Australian yobbo, which I think I do.
 

Burgey

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Another prediction,

As nasty a contest (sledgy wise) as 2013-14, if not more so.
I’m not so sure about that tbh. Looking at the home team, Warner doesn’t say much these days, though he may reprise his old role for the occasion; Bancroft is daybooing; Khawaja is pretty quiet; TPC might chirp abit but stymied by the captaincy; Peter might use his hands to sign language instead of comb; SMarsh is usually stoned; Paine a bolt out of the blue; Starc will; Cummins I don’t think so much; lyon won’t though he goosed himself with the Prior comments and Haze just seems to get on with it for the most part.

For England, Cook is pretty quiet because he’s posh; random opener will
Be more worried about his place, as will random number three; Root is in the same role as TPC; Stokes isn’t there at five to ramp it up; Bairstow is probably too nice a bloke; Ali certainly is too nice a bloke; Woakes maybe, really don’t know him; likewise the other bowler; but of course Broad and Anderson are ****s.

I think there’ll be a bit going on but not like 2013 imo.
 

Gob

International Coach
I’m not so sure about that tbh. Looking at the home team, Warner doesn’t say much these days, though he may reprise his old role for the occasion; Bancroft is daybooing; Khawaja is pretty quiet; TPC might chirp abit but stymied by the captaincy; Peter might use his hands to sign language instead of comb; SMarsh is usually stoned; Paine a bolt out of the blue; Starc will; Cummins I don’t think so much; lyon won’t though he goosed himself with the Prior comments and Haze just seems to get on with it for the most part.

For England, Cook is pretty quiet because he’s posh; random opener will
Be more worried about his place, as will random number three; Root is in the same role as TPC; Stokes isn’t there at five to ramp it up; Bairstow is probably too nice a bloke; Ali certainly is too nice a bloke; Woakes maybe, really don’t know him; likewise the other bowler; but of course Broad and Anderson are ****s.

I think there’ll be a bit going on but not like 2013 imo.
Pete will use his hands to throw TPC under the bus as he did so often in India
 

cnerd123

likes this
I’m not so sure about that tbh. Looking at the home team, Warner doesn’t say much these days, though he may reprise his old role for the occasion; Bancroft is daybooing; Khawaja is pretty quiet; TPC might chirp abit but stymied by the captaincy; Peter might use his hands to sign language instead of comb; SMarsh is usually stoned; Paine a bolt out of the blue; Starc will; Cummins I don’t think so much; lyon won’t though he goosed himself with the Prior comments and Haze just seems to get on with it for the most part.

For England, Cook is pretty quiet because he’s posh; random opener will
Be more worried about his place, as will random number three; Root is in the same role as TPC; Stokes isn’t there at five to ramp it up; Bairstow is probably too nice a bloke; Ali certainly is too nice a bloke; Woakes maybe, really don’t know him; likewise the other bowler; but of course Broad and Anderson are ****s.

I think there’ll be a bit going on but not like 2013 imo.
Ok
 

Cow

Banned
It always get blown out of proportion.

How scary is Michael Clarke saying "get ready for a broken arm" in his middle class suburban Sydney twang. It equates to Alastair Cook threatening to bomp you on the noggin with his violin.
 

FBU

International Debutant
England will drop more catches than Australia. First dropped catch will be off Broad's bowling.
 

Tangles

International Vice-Captain
Think it will be 4-0 to Australia. Playing safe that either weather, Sydney/Melb, or Hume highway decks will lead to England drawing once. Going 3 nil up and having bowlers 'rested' also a chance.
 

Gob

International Coach
Think it will be 4-0 to Australia. Playing safe that either weather, Sydney/Melb, or Hume highway decks will lead to England drawing once. Going 3 nil up and having bowlers 'rested' also a chance.
Winning the first test is crucial. If they go to Adelaide with 0-0 and England win that (since thats their best chance) things could go south
 

Burgey

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3-1 Aus
Runs - Khawaja, Root
Wickets - Haze, Anderson
Compton-Miller - Haze
Random prediction - whoever opens with Cook to have a decent series
 

flibbertyjibber

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2-2
Runs - Khawaja and Root
Wickets - Hazlewood and Broad
Random prediction - Starc and Cummins to both be out injured before Melbourne.
 

morgieb

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4-1 Aus
Runs - Warner, Root
Wickets - Starc, Broad
Random prediction - Tim Paine to surprise everyone and average 40+. Marsh and Cummins to break down before the 3rd Test.
 

Furball

Evil Scotsman
4-1 Australia
Runs: Smith, Root
Wickets: Hazelwood, Anderson
Surprises: Tim Paine and Joe Root to score centuries
 

MW1304

Cricketer Of The Year
4-0 Australia
Runs: Smith, Moeen
Wickets: Hazlewood, Broad
Prediction: Play our best game at the WACA, even threatening to draw
 

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