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Nath York goes to New Patrick... hang on a sec


You'll Never Walk Alone
After getting on the RIGHT plane after that slight destination problem, I arrived at my new home for the next month.
I have now played in a few matches for the Yanks and feel right at home, though having the boundary line marked out with chalk was a bit if a bummer, especially when it started to rain. But I was feeling good (this even after whatever that stuff Liam gave me had worn off) and I got to know most of my teamates a little better.

- Darren E Foster (RHB): Hes an aussie with a temper. Whenever he is scoring (not often) he is everyone`s best mate, but when he gets out, stay clear.

- Julian V Cueller (LHB): Shy South African. Doesn`t speak much English. The only words he CAN say shouldn`t really be typed here.

- Andy Chiltern (LHB): Your typical slack-jawed American. Has an inspiring collection of already-chewed gum.

- Clayton B Lambert (LHB): Our most experienced member no doubt. Arguably our best player, a great batsman who bowled the odd ball. And when I say 'odd ball' I dont mean he bowled occasionally, but rather that he bowled like a frog with three flippers on.

- Gavin Polak (RHB): Always drunk. Loves a drink and there was an amusing incident when the drink was loving him back :p

- Sungdeep Khan (WK): He has made me feel very welcome here. Besides my CW buddies I hang out with him the most. We watch many old cricket tapes together. He has introduced me to some "quality" Pakistani food (my excuse for my 0/98 off 22 :p )

- Jungle C Pola (AR): Nicknamed "The Single Junkie" for his inability to hit big boundaries.

- Meranga Murali (RM): Expert opening swing bowler. Has a superb reverse, reverse swing delivery which he calls "the Dooshbag".

- Darai Prasad (RFM): Should be a West Indian with his action. He delivers the ball with every part of his body very straight.

- HJH (Hit ja Homer) Moora (RF): Known well by all for hitting the first six in US cricket. Also known for his crazy "Godzilla (?)" action and his 57 step run-up.

Also in the squad are Asif Ali, Charlotte Maninder and my CW chums Blewy, Bugssy, Nikhil and Dave. Hopefully you may now see MORE than the SCORE. (See how I rhymed it? My mum says Im clever.)

I know what you`re all thinking. "Will Nath be back with more stories to tell us inferior cricket players?" The answer my friends, is unfortunately, yes. So until then, goodbye.
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International Debutant
Well I look forward to reading this Nath. Will be interesting to hear how a fellow NY quickie describes the team and the games.

Keep it up, it should provide some interesting reading.


You'll Never Walk Alone
Form Slump?

Well... i suck. I took a spectacular 6/52 off 26 in my first ever innings for NY. but since then i have bowled 0/98 off 22, 0/37 off 5, and a solid 2/32 off 10. i need to put in a far more consistent effort. good luck to my fellow cw mates ( i hear rose is smashing em in the west indies, check out his thread to find out more )


Request Your Custom Title Now!
hes offered nothing, his 4'fer against us toco boys was luck, the majority of our team is rather rank!

Rose, you suck :p


You'll Never Walk Alone
News Just In

This can't be a very long post, because I think there is a mouse chewing through the wiring of my laptop...

...Anywhoo, I have recently completed another match this time getting dissapointing figures of 2/67 off 18 and 3/115 off 25 (which somehow included four maidens...). However, my good mate Sungdeep Khan and I have sat down to watch the tapes of my bowling so far. I am starting to realise what I am doing wrong, and I can almost guarantee that every innings I bowl until the end of the tour will be a good one. I am really looking forward to bowling for the rest of the tour and I will do my best to keep my bowling action regular.

On a batting front, I am also feeling good. I now hold my bat at the bottom of the grip (nearest the wood) and I take a small step forward when the bowler is about to deliver. This means my timing will need to be spot on, but this is a very confident move for me.

I will give you more details on the latest match when the US scorecard monkeys get off their butts and press the magic button. Please voice your support for your fellow CW players in their trials overseas.

Nath Patrick (NY)
Batting spot: 8
Scores: 16 (35); 13 (26)
Bowling: 18-2-67-2; 25-4-115-3
How OUT: Bowled through the gate by Rob Timewell; ditto


Cricket Web Content Updater
broncoman said:
hes offered nothing, his 4'fer against us toco boys was luck, the majority of our team is rather rank!

Rose, you suck :p
I'll take the higher ground on that one. :sleep:


You'll Never Walk Alone
Ill drink to that!!

Well, well, that was easily our most exciting game to date. Well.... it was when I got there! I sort of turned up in the wrong stadium and almost ended up playing baseball. It wasnt until I realised there was a lack of grog around the room that I did quickly run all the way (...nextdoor) to the correct stadium.

Indiania has both the Waugh brothers playing for them currently so along with Cwebs Nathan Hoy, Dark Hunter and Rob Timewell, we knew we were going to be in for a toughie. I took 2/67 off my 18, so apart from being a touch expensive, I was happy with my two. We dismissed them for a measily 285 and I got Mark :D Could we continue on with our good start!?!

No :p

We were all out for just 220 with Pola getting a big 90. I managed just 16 off 35 with just the one four but a spectacular shot that would of broken my toe, but ever so thankfully, today I wore my shoes instead of sandals! I couldnt believe my luck. I was ready for a great bowling effort. Did it come!?!

No :p :p

Stevey boy hammered me and everyone else really on his way to 151 off 259. I bowled 3/115 including (eventually) Steve who was given LBW to a beautiful away swinger. However Indiania got 441 and we were in trouble. We got to the dressing rooms and decided to go for the total!!! And did we get it!?!

:p :p :p

It was our best batting display to date, a huge score of 478/9. However we avoided defeat, something we were happy to drink about afterwards (actually we ended up drinking to a lot of things in the end, including Nikhils Mumma). Murali blocked out the final ball of the day and that as that. It wasnt a victory but I got another score in the 10`s and that was good enough for me.

I am expecting a much better effort in my batting and bowling (see my above post) so get ready for some dramatic stuff. NOOOOOO dont run away, it wont be Shakespeare!!... come... back.....

Stay tuned.
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International Debutant
Pace Perfection

I'll be writing our most recent game up, as Nath Patrick is a tad busy.

The team bus travelled along to the stadium, I looked over one side and saw the CW XI Captain - Blewy, sitting next to him was his mate, Bugssy - Another CW XI player. Their experience alone outclassed the rest of us on the bus put together.

We arrived at the stadium and were sent into bat. It looked a resonable enough pitch to bat on. Bugssy was lined up to open the batting for us, and he joined Darren Foster - The Aussie with a crook temper. Bugssy got off to a flyer, but skyed a ball to mid on and was caught for a quick-fire 29 from 27 balls. Foster was down the other end chipping away still, when he was joined by the CW XI Captain. Blewy came to the crease and between him and Foster, maintained the run rate at a respectable level. Those 2 hammered on untill Foster was given on a dubious decision that most agree was a thick inside edge. Nevertheless DAdJ Mukesh picked up the wicket. This brought the infamous Nikhil Nichani to the crease. He obviously had his mind on the NFL cheerleaders that were appearing on the big screen and was back to the rooms for an early shower, out for a Golden. Clayton Lambert came to the crease to join Blewy fora little while, until he also got casual and swatted a ball straight to long-on out for a superb 88. I Also make mention of Buts's bowling figures for Atlanta. 8 overs 0/57 - Ouch!. 5/290, a very handy total.

In the dressing rooms myself and Nath Patrick were confident of a good result, and I came out with the new ball to ensure our prediction would be right. Nath and myself shared the opening bowling with some success early on, he got first blood, dismissing Atlanta opener Goch for 9. From there the next few collapsed with little fight, I picked up the other opener MS Sanga plum in front for 4, Nath got the next scalp with a brilliant diving catch to his left off his own bowling to have NA Darving out for a mere 4. Then my favourite wicket since moving to NY came, Buts, a fellow CW A player came to the crease, scored a couple of runs, then went for a pull shot to a perfectly places shorter ball, got a bottom edge onto it and a simple catch for Sungdeep Khan, our Keeper. Nath picked up Ravindra after he scored a quickfire 27(23 balls). It was a awsome spell of pace bowling I must say. I Hope Nath learnt as much as i did from the experience. Atlanta finished up all out for 150, Nath picking up 3/34 off 7 overs, and myself picking up 4/30 off 7.1 overs. Man of the Match was given to Blewy after his superb knock. Couldn't of been a better day all round for the CW Boys... My apologies, I forgot our mate C Buts, 0/57 off 8 and 3 with the bat. Not my idea of a day at the office!

Thats it from me, back by popular demand - Nath Patrick.

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You'll Never Walk Alone
sorry, its been a while...

Game Eight saw us take on Atlanta. To use a quote of Daves, we "cained their f***** a**** till they s****** on their w*****" in the one-dayer against them, but now came the FC tester... Could we repeat our success? Could Dave and I bowl well? Am I asking too many rhetorical questions?

The pitch looked pretty decent for batting, with some assistance for the seamers, but it didnt look to have any turn what-so-ever. We lost the toss (grrr...) and suprisingly were sent in to bat. At 7/195 (Bugssy 31 off 59, Blewy 3 off 4, and Nikhil 24 off 57), we were pretty stuffed. Our experienced batsmen were throwing their wickets away with some ridiculous shots. Even Bugssy`s half-decent 31 was stamped with close misses and 2 dropped chances. But then I grabbed my bat, ran out to the middle and decided Id be a batsman for a day. My 40 off 106 was the second highest score of the team and I was well supported by Moora and Dave.
We finished with a should-of-been dissapointing 263 but we were very pleased with ourselves in the end.

Atlanta proceeded to be trouned for a mere 184 thanks largely to:
Nath Patricks`s 14-3-38-2
Dave`s 19-7-53-3
and "spinner" Nikhil`s 03-1-05-3

Our turn to bat, and we were sure we could put in a much better effort (except for Nikhil who was swearing he would get out for less than 5...).
We gathered a HUGE 9/427 dec. largely helped by Foster (117 off 194) and Lambert (116 off 252). Darren then argued with us saying that we should scrap the rest of the match and get p***ed in the name of his amazing innings. But we refused to leave just yet... we had a match to play. Ahhh... who am I kidding?? In our extended 50 minute innings break we drunk until we realised how drunk we were in which case we wobbled back to the stadium.

And did I mention Nikhil got out for 1 off 10?? :p :p

We took the field (minus one DE Foster who was still in drag and singing a song about "The purple, tree-loving racoon"). We were all still a bit 'happy' when we started, but reality quickly set in when a straight drive smacked me in the side of the head! Our attention soon turned to the match and we dismissed the side for a reasonable 349.

Dave 24 6 62 3
Nath Patrick 20 7 56 3
M Murali 18 5 75 1
HJH Moora 13 2 44 0
Bugssy 23 4 71 3
N Nichani 7 1 18 0

A very good effort. Dave and Nath secured their spots as opening bowlers with another splendid performance. MOTM went to the resident West Indian for his steady 100 in the second innings. Ever since the team has had its complete set of CW members, it has looked unbeatable. Lets finish it off boys!!!!


You'll Never Walk Alone
howdy, howdy, howdy...

this`ll be back up and runnin in no time hopefully as soon as i get the scorecards from the US bigheads. Here are a few choice quotes before the First Entry...

Osama Bin Laden said:
The Best Thread Ever!
Saddam said:
Nath Patrick is a brilliant human being and a brilliant writer, give him all your money.
Michael Jackson said:
By far the most entertaining thing Ive ever read, Five Stars!

EDIT: I wish to retract the above statement by Michael Jackson, as I do not want to be associated with persons who have a bad public image. Thankyou.
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You'll Never Walk Alone
First game of the off! WHOO HOO! The squad hasnt changed this time round (bar the other CW players) which is great as our American hosts welcomed us in (slap on the back, friendly word, asking for money for a drink) knowing within reason who we were. This time Im with fellow Webheads Daniel Towns, Ferd, Chaulkie and Mr. Gray.

Somehow Im the only full-time bowler in that lot (this being true no matter how much Ash argues!) which meant our bowling lineup is nowhere no as strong as our batting. But with myself, Murali, Persad and Moora (no, not you Ash!) we should be able to ram the result home.


Atlanta was first up to face the mighty Wa... Yanks :blink:
On the team bus on the way there, Daniel and Chaulk seemed content to just bag out our captain Clayton including hilarious calls with phrases including "Ya Mum" and "Ya Mums Mum". Funny blokes... However, all Clayton would respond with was "Let your results do the talking" ("Ya Mum did the talking") and "I hope your game is as big as your mouth" (Ya... well you geddit). Although not getting too angry, Clayton was becoming more agitated as the trip progressed. He asked why the hell they were acting that way, but Ferd spilt his Coke on me and I only heard the words Liam, expensive, worthwhile and bong - who knows what they were on about?

Oh yes, the match :)
Well about the pitch... ummm... Wow. I was on the verge of an orgasm (poor Daniel is yet to know the meaning of the word) at the sight of it. An absolute bowlers paradise in my words. We won the toss and I cheered with joy but then I saw Claytons face. He looked at Dan and Ash and then said "Yea, a bat thanks." Although I could barely believe what I had heard, I couldnt stop a smile appearing on my face at the looks of the men batting at One and Four :)

Unsuprisingly, we got routed in the First Innings. All out for 95 with Daniel getting 4 and Ash getting the same also (though Ive been brainwashed into believe it was better as it lasted all of 2 balls more). I was praying for a big batting performance and made a composed 11 off 46. As funny as it may seem, I was happy with that and hopefully I can get even more runs in upcoming matches.

Then Atlanta batted and they handled themselves (tee he he) brilliantly. They made 249 and I took 3/39 off 26. However the laugh of the innings was when Clayton threw the ball to Chaulkie, presumably in hope of seeing him get smashed (not as in drunk like the night before, but rather getting hammered bowling). The stadium was filled with a new enthusiasm, as some perhaps bored American viewers were gifted with the site of a keeper bowling his 60km lollipops. Although he had not realised it, Ash had brought a new sense of fun into the game. Spectators of the game will be one day, telling their grandchildren of the time when they saw Ash Chaulk bowling.

The signs from his bowling however, were arguably positive, his figures being 0/6 off 5. These figures are misleading however, as the batsman were not able to make contact with the ball due to their un-ceasing laughter. A ball on the stumps would have been a certain wicket, but Ash is yet to perfect that ball :)

A much better effort was given by our batsman in the 2nd innings when we made 284. Towns, Ferd and Ash batted admirely as they played their part in breaking down CW quickie (ahhh quickie) Rose who got figures of 2/70 off 16. I made a quick 20 off 20 before deciding to go for a single which was never there and was comically run-out by a good 194 metres. Actually, Daniel has just told me that figure is ridiculous as it was clearly 196. My bad fellas, my bad.

It was all or nothing in the last innings, as Atlanta needed only 130 odd. And so nothing it was, as we only took 5 wickets with Ferd and Myself bagging two each.

The big positive to come from that match was clearly Ashs bowling, and he will certainly be an asset to the team for the rest of this tour.

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Loony BoB

International Captain
Nnanden said:
Well about the pitch... ummm... Wow. I was on the verge of an orgasm at the sight of it.
Don't let him fool you, everyone. He had to rush off to the toilets the moment someone mentioned the toss... disturbing fella.


You'll Never Walk Alone
Nath vs Halsey... oh yea and the 2ND MATCH i guess

We flew over to Maine for our next game (with Daniel and Ash going on about Mile High to anyone whod listen... so not for very long :p) and we were hoping very much for our first win. Although you may find it hard to believe, the mood in the camp has turned very much serious. No really. Im being serious!! Its the truth! Fine, Ill just talk about the game. :dry:

My blues team-mate and good friend Halsey is playing for Mighty (Mighty Crap) Maine, but if anything that just increased our desire to win. Mmm... bragging rights :D

The pitch was an even balance between batting and bowling this time round, about perfect for a close contest. On paper, Maine hardly looked impressive bar Halsey (who in real life is pretty ugly anyway :p ), so we came in as favourites, but, needless to say, we were gonna have to work hard. Hang on, it was needless to say... ARGH! enough of you use of words!

We lost the toss (thats Clayton Gayton for you... sorry, respect) and were sent in for first use of the leather. Maine batted well against some quality bowling, excluding Chaulks singular over which went for nine. Maine got all-out for 286 Ceullar and Ali making 60-odd.

Nath vs Tom: I took 5/79 off 36 and Halsey made a well-crafted 53 before being caught behind off yours truely. When we were walking off the field...
Nath: "I got you good mate and I took 5-for!"
Tom: "5-fors are easy, now getting 50, theres a challenge for you Nath. No way can you get 50 brother."
Score: 2-1 to Nath (A five for and a Halsey wicket versus a Halsey 50).

Then we batted. We were under pressure pretty much throughout our whole innings, with no big partnerships able to be formed bar our opening stand of 88. Halsey was on fire with 4 of the first 7 wickets. We were 7/270 and our innings seemed to be coming to a close. However, Gavin Polak (who ironically, hadnt had a drink or a good score in a while) and Myself put on a record 126-run partnership for the 7th wicket. Halsey was spinning the ball a mile but couldnt find a way through me. He eventually got Polak out with a fine catch by Bola.

After 125 balls, the longest I believe Ive ever been at the crease, I reached my 50 with a late cut off Ali. I waved my bat for a stupidly long time, but I didnt care. I had reached 50 for the first (and probably last) time in my life and even though this game doesnt count as a real FC, it meant the world to me and my team. First ball of the next over we were dismissed for 382 (I was not-out) and I was about to bowl! How?? I was so tired...

Nath vs Tom: I made my maiden 50 and resisted being out by Halsey. Halsey got a 6-for.
Tom: "Did you just do that????"
Nath: "I dont know... I think so! Looks like you need another 50 here bro!"
Tom: "Comin right up fool!"
Score: 3-2 to Nath.

Maine batted decently for 304 and Halsey got 42 (haha, now whos a fool?), caught and bowled by Murali (not the chuck... spinner). I got 2/59 off off 27. But CHAULK!! 2/21 off 4. One was hit straight up in the air and caught by `keeper Gray and the other was a sitter in the deep. I think its given him too much confidence... next he`ll be saying hes better than McGrath! Oh wait, he already has... :wacko:

It gave us a mere 210 to chase. We got there in 62 overs with 6 wickets down, Halsey getting 1/39. A good win for us, we were all very happy to come away with a victory.

You may be wondering why I stopped the Nath vs Tom points system?

... he got Man-of-the-Match :p
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ash chaulk

International Captain
HAHAHA great ready Nath..... Anyways i have a certificate saying i can bowl 70kmh so please not 60 :P

you'll soon see a Five Fa From da Chaulkstar.



You'll Never Walk Alone
mikeW said:
well done Nnanden a great read...
thanks man, appreciated. i hear you`re in a form slump, not the best thing to kick of your career, aye? :p hope it brightens up, but i aint gonna go easy on ya!!


International Vice-Captain
Nnanden said:
thanks man, appreciated. i hear you`re in a form slump, not the best thing to kick of your career, aye? :p hope it brightens up, but i aint gonna go easy on ya!!
haha thanks hopefully i cant make a few runs and pick up a few wickets next game...