THE BYE IN KARE KUP KRISISThe BYE held crisis talks with CribbSim officials late last night, threatening to withdraw from the Care Cup following a shock first round loss to the Squirts. At the crux of the dispute was a late scheduling change, depriving The BYE of their first round clash against the Koyal Kamplers and catching the players off-guard.
A representative of The BYE's corporate leadership, A Vauge, Yet Menacing, Government Agency, expressed displeasure at the loss of revenue associated with the postponement of the #BattleOfTheSriLankanDomesticKeepers. Meanwhile, the BYE General Manager, Theodore Long fronted media after the defeat, caught mumbling "should've drafted Ashwin for this". Long took no questions, and his statement is provided in full below:
"Holla holla playas, now that was not a good day at the office. But we'd prepared for the Koyal Kamplers and got the Squirts, it's like prepping to go ONE ON ONE WITH DA UNDERTAKAH and having a tag team match instead!"
The crisis only deepened with news that, between the CWPL draft and the first Care Cup match being played, Ben Stokes had actually been imprisoned, Mohammad Amir announced his retirement from long-form cricket, Misbah-ul-Haq had become coach of Pakistan, and Wasim Jaffer had died.
Stokes is due for release in 2024, Amir will probably sell out his principles if the money is right, and Jaffer will make a full recovery, meaning all will be available for the opening round of the CWPL season-proper. Misbah-ul-Haq has been named in the squad for the second trial match; on Wednesday evening he told officials that he expects to be fired and back at training by Thursday morning.
The BYE Chairman of Selectors, Mary the Horse, has made two changes to the 12-player squad ahead of the second trial match. Jaffer's death has resulted in NSW cricketing hero Nick Bertus being promoted to the playing XI, as BJ Watling has still not fully recovered from his knee injury. Yasir Shah replaces Rachin Ravindra, who has been made 12th man for this match.
We think we're playing the Koyal Kamplers this time, but we're not quite sure. It starts sometime, somewhere. Keep using the hashtag #BattleOfTheSriLankanDomesticKeepers, because we spent way too much money getting a consultant to come up with it.
The squad is as follows:
- Tatenda Taibu
- Nick Larkin
- Rohit Sharma
- Mominul Haque
- Nick Bertus
- Scott Kuggeleijn
- Yasir Shah
- Aizaz Cheema
- Malinda Pushpakumara
- Mohammad Asif
- Rachin Ravindra