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First Class Round 1 Match Reports
- Thread starter Simon
- Start date
HeathDavisSpeed
Cricket Web: All-Time Legend
The Daily Davis (sister paper to the Halfly Heath and the Twice Nightly Dickin-son)
This week's feature comes from the Auckland vs. Karachi match where the interest of the reporter, ex-of Cornwall Cricket Club was piqued by the circulation pre-match of a *** tape featuring Daryl Tuffey, a pair of rather large Canteloupe Melons and a pair of seldom used gardening gloves. The presence of a juice maker could neither be confirmed nor denied from the grainy tape provided to the press.
To the match, and Auckland came to the crease first hoping to amass a big score. Sadly, the top order was taken apart by fast-bowling of the like that hasn't been seen since the last time Shoiab Akhtar was offered a decent amount of cash and media exposure to play in a game of cricket. Well, that was for an over or two during which he dismissed opening bat Roberts with a lifting ball that garnered the edge. Soon after, a suspected broken finger nail was sustained and Akhtar was reduced to the pace of a Wellington locomotive again.
Where Shoaib failed, Ahmed and Hussain took up the challenge, leaving the Auckland batting in disarray at 85-5. Paul Hitchcock joined Rob Nicol and decided to score runs in a first class match for the first time in his pathetic career and together they salvaged the Auckland batting. Hitchcock fell for 70 but Nicol batted on with a seemingly delighted Daryl Tuffey; closing the Auckland innings with a declaration at 407.
At this point, the correspondent fell asleep due to the heady combination of Tui and that nether regions ointment provided by the Fiery Farmacy. Oooh, the relief.
On waking, the lethal bowling combo of Andre Adams and Daryl 'sono il dio de seso' Tuffey were operating together and sweeping up the last dregs of the Karachi innings for a final total of 351.
Frankly, the Auckland innings was a disappointment from such heady heights. Akhtar again failed to ignite, whilst a bomb planted by the Anti Smacking Socialists Workers Party was diffused with relative ease and without interrupting the cricket. Hitchcock lived up to his dismal reputation second time around with a 7 ball duck, falling to former Wolverhampton Wanderers midfield maestro, Steve Froggett.
The final innings target was set at the 300 mark, and Karachi set off in pursuit in abysmal fashion. Former Russ Abbot 'comedy' character, Basildon Bond ripped out the top four with consumate ease, paralysing the footwork of the top order with a continual stream of 1980s puns. A comical run out resulted in the dismissal of Kabir who fell whilst trying to do a reconstruction at the batting crease of the video to Ok Go's seminal classic, Here We Go Again. A sneaky Mills upped the speed on the exercise machine whilst Kabir was distracted by a Basildon Bond magic trick, slipped, fell and was run out some metres short of his ground.
The Karachi innings was in tatters at 52-5 and did not last much longer, the players home in time to watch the afternoon episode of Home and Away and marvel about how many fit, but ultimately vacant women they've had on that show. Its amazing isn't it? Where do they find them (NB. This view excludes that bint who has a head that looks as if its been panel beaten into shape and smothered in half a gallon of Johnson & Johnson's baby oil; I mean, what arsehole did they dredge her up from?)
Auckland won, by the way.
This week's feature comes from the Auckland vs. Karachi match where the interest of the reporter, ex-of Cornwall Cricket Club was piqued by the circulation pre-match of a *** tape featuring Daryl Tuffey, a pair of rather large Canteloupe Melons and a pair of seldom used gardening gloves. The presence of a juice maker could neither be confirmed nor denied from the grainy tape provided to the press.
To the match, and Auckland came to the crease first hoping to amass a big score. Sadly, the top order was taken apart by fast-bowling of the like that hasn't been seen since the last time Shoiab Akhtar was offered a decent amount of cash and media exposure to play in a game of cricket. Well, that was for an over or two during which he dismissed opening bat Roberts with a lifting ball that garnered the edge. Soon after, a suspected broken finger nail was sustained and Akhtar was reduced to the pace of a Wellington locomotive again.
Where Shoaib failed, Ahmed and Hussain took up the challenge, leaving the Auckland batting in disarray at 85-5. Paul Hitchcock joined Rob Nicol and decided to score runs in a first class match for the first time in his pathetic career and together they salvaged the Auckland batting. Hitchcock fell for 70 but Nicol batted on with a seemingly delighted Daryl Tuffey; closing the Auckland innings with a declaration at 407.
At this point, the correspondent fell asleep due to the heady combination of Tui and that nether regions ointment provided by the Fiery Farmacy. Oooh, the relief.
On waking, the lethal bowling combo of Andre Adams and Daryl 'sono il dio de seso' Tuffey were operating together and sweeping up the last dregs of the Karachi innings for a final total of 351.
Frankly, the Auckland innings was a disappointment from such heady heights. Akhtar again failed to ignite, whilst a bomb planted by the Anti Smacking Socialists Workers Party was diffused with relative ease and without interrupting the cricket. Hitchcock lived up to his dismal reputation second time around with a 7 ball duck, falling to former Wolverhampton Wanderers midfield maestro, Steve Froggett.
The final innings target was set at the 300 mark, and Karachi set off in pursuit in abysmal fashion. Former Russ Abbot 'comedy' character, Basildon Bond ripped out the top four with consumate ease, paralysing the footwork of the top order with a continual stream of 1980s puns. A comical run out resulted in the dismissal of Kabir who fell whilst trying to do a reconstruction at the batting crease of the video to Ok Go's seminal classic, Here We Go Again. A sneaky Mills upped the speed on the exercise machine whilst Kabir was distracted by a Basildon Bond magic trick, slipped, fell and was run out some metres short of his ground.
The Karachi innings was in tatters at 52-5 and did not last much longer, the players home in time to watch the afternoon episode of Home and Away and marvel about how many fit, but ultimately vacant women they've had on that show. Its amazing isn't it? Where do they find them (NB. This view excludes that bint who has a head that looks as if its been panel beaten into shape and smothered in half a gallon of Johnson & Johnson's baby oil; I mean, what arsehole did they dredge her up from?)
Auckland won, by the way.
Simon
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Cobras Young Gun Leads The Way
Nineteen-year old Richard Levi playing in just his 11th First Class match of his career steered Cape Cobras to an impressive round one win. Playing in front of a vocal home crowd at Sahara Park in Newlands the home side was in control from the opening overs. It was expected that rivals Titans would put up more of a show but the Cobras five man pace attack and their ferocious batting line up had too much power.
After winning the toss and sending Titans in, captain Graeme Smith and his team were celebrating the wicket of international AB DeVilliers for just 10, showing faith in his youngsters Smith threw the new ball to Yannick Porter and Pepler Sandri. Both of these guys toiled hard but it wasn't until Jacques Kallis got his hands on the ball that things turned in favour of the home side. With the wickets of Holland, Kuhn and Morkel, Titans were in a load of trouble at 7/222 but some lower order hitting saw them add a few more before being bowled out for 267. Experienced number three Martin Van Jaarseeld led the way for Titans with an impressive 80, he had precious littled support outside of Holland (46) and Albie Morkel (38). Kallis was the pick of the bowlers taking 4/75 off his 21 overs while Justin Kemp (3/43) showed what a valuable all round asses he will be this season.
Justin Kemp appeals for the wicket of Martin Van Jaarsveld
Cobras had no such problems with the conditions and went about building a huge total, an opening stand of 83 between Smith (81) and Gibbs (38) got the team off to a good start but it the real story of the innings was Richard Levi who scored a breathtaking 243 not out. With the game in the balance at 6/276 some quick wickets could have easily seen Cobras lead cut to just a small one for the second innings, after Kemp fell with the score at 315 Levi was joined by Yannick Porter (108) and together they posted an eighth wicket stand of 234. The innings was eventually closed at 9/629 a first innings lead of 362.
Smith was in fine form before falling for 81
The second innings was again tough going for Titans as their batsman failed to fire, the game was over when du Plessis was trapped in front by Porter as the score fell to 6/122. Again some late order resistance but it was a foregone conclusion as Titans were all out for 229. Albie Morkel again showed some talent with the stick as he made an unbeaten 59, while Van Jaarsveld (39) also looked the goods. Justin Kemp this time the pick of the bowlers with 4/43, while Kallis (2/26) and Philander (2/44) can also be pleased with their work.
Cobras 9/dec/629 (R Levi 243*, Y Porter 108, G Smith 81, D Steyn 3/122, P Joubert 2/98)
defeated
Titans 267 (M Van Jaarsveld 80, A Holland 46, J Kallis 4/75, J Kemp 3/43) and
Titans 229 (A Morkel 59*, M Van Jaarsveld 39, J Kemp 4/43, J Kallis 2/26)
by an Innings 133 Runs
Cape Cobras Player of the year votes
3- Richard Levi
2- Justin Kemp
1- Yannick Porter
Nineteen-year old Richard Levi playing in just his 11th First Class match of his career steered Cape Cobras to an impressive round one win. Playing in front of a vocal home crowd at Sahara Park in Newlands the home side was in control from the opening overs. It was expected that rivals Titans would put up more of a show but the Cobras five man pace attack and their ferocious batting line up had too much power.
After winning the toss and sending Titans in, captain Graeme Smith and his team were celebrating the wicket of international AB DeVilliers for just 10, showing faith in his youngsters Smith threw the new ball to Yannick Porter and Pepler Sandri. Both of these guys toiled hard but it wasn't until Jacques Kallis got his hands on the ball that things turned in favour of the home side. With the wickets of Holland, Kuhn and Morkel, Titans were in a load of trouble at 7/222 but some lower order hitting saw them add a few more before being bowled out for 267. Experienced number three Martin Van Jaarseeld led the way for Titans with an impressive 80, he had precious littled support outside of Holland (46) and Albie Morkel (38). Kallis was the pick of the bowlers taking 4/75 off his 21 overs while Justin Kemp (3/43) showed what a valuable all round asses he will be this season.
Justin Kemp appeals for the wicket of Martin Van Jaarsveld
Cobras had no such problems with the conditions and went about building a huge total, an opening stand of 83 between Smith (81) and Gibbs (38) got the team off to a good start but it the real story of the innings was Richard Levi who scored a breathtaking 243 not out. With the game in the balance at 6/276 some quick wickets could have easily seen Cobras lead cut to just a small one for the second innings, after Kemp fell with the score at 315 Levi was joined by Yannick Porter (108) and together they posted an eighth wicket stand of 234. The innings was eventually closed at 9/629 a first innings lead of 362.
Smith was in fine form before falling for 81
The second innings was again tough going for Titans as their batsman failed to fire, the game was over when du Plessis was trapped in front by Porter as the score fell to 6/122. Again some late order resistance but it was a foregone conclusion as Titans were all out for 229. Albie Morkel again showed some talent with the stick as he made an unbeaten 59, while Van Jaarsveld (39) also looked the goods. Justin Kemp this time the pick of the bowlers with 4/43, while Kallis (2/26) and Philander (2/44) can also be pleased with their work.
Cobras 9/dec/629 (R Levi 243*, Y Porter 108, G Smith 81, D Steyn 3/122, P Joubert 2/98)
defeated
Titans 267 (M Van Jaarsveld 80, A Holland 46, J Kallis 4/75, J Kemp 3/43) and
Titans 229 (A Morkel 59*, M Van Jaarsveld 39, J Kemp 4/43, J Kallis 2/26)
by an Innings 133 Runs
Cape Cobras Player of the year votes
3- Richard Levi
2- Justin Kemp
1- Yannick Porter
Mister Wright
Cricket Web: All-Time Legend
Queensland Touched-up By Tait
South Australian super quick Shaun Tait single handedly belted Queensland during their first round Division Two first class clash on the weekend. The rejuvenated speedster broke the hearts of the Queenslanders with 7-74 in the first innings and 5-65 in the second innings. Only Martin Love (120) was able to post a triple figure score, although Symonds (72) and Noffke (70) did their best to save the side in the second innings, but both fell victim to the remorseless Tait.
South Australia had no hesitation in batting on a wicket that looked as batsman friendly as an U/12 spin bowler. Bichel picked up the early wicket of Cosgrove for 10, but that would be Queensland's last joy for a while as Matthew Elliot (82) and Darren Lehmann (145) combined for a 156 run partnership. Noffke (6-70) was the man to break the partnership as Elliot mistimed a pull shot that balloned to Noffke who barely had to move to take an easy catch. That was the only joy for the Queenslanders for another 110 runs as Lehmann and Callum Ferguson (62) settled in on a very good deck. It was Noffke again who had the breaktrhough as he trapped Lehmann in front 5 short of his 150. Early on day two Queensland were able to pick up regular wickets and restrict what looked to be a 500 plus score to 381. Noffke was the chief destroyer with six wickets and Bichel the other main wicket taker with 3-75.
A solid start to the Queensland first innings was provided by openers Matthew Hayden (42)and Shane Watson (25). Watson, in particular, punished Tait's early erraticness. However, the big quick had revenge removing both batsmen. Love batted brilliantly for his 120 has wickets fell around him. He received some support from the lower order, Noffke with 45 and wicket keeper MacDonald with 46, but the Bulls were left with a defecit of 34.
Early wickets were needed from Queensland in the second innings, and after a rather solid start from the South Australian openers the Bulls managed to pick up two wickets with the score on 47. Elliot was brilliantly bowled by Kasprowicz (3-79) for 23 and next ball Mark Cosgrove was run out backing up for 24. The Bulls then struggled to claim a bunch of wickets which they required, instead the Redbacks were able to provide healthy partnerships throughout the innings. Ferguson reached his second half century of the match with 62, Turton managed 51, but Goodwin was the mainstay of the innings with a fine 103. Queensland were left with 390 to win after the Redbacks were dismissed for 355.
Queensland didn't get the start they were after with Hayden (9), Watson (16) and Jimmy Jenkins (0) all back in the pavillion with the score on 40. Symonds was the rock of the middle order with 70 and found support only in Ashley Noffke who contributed with 72. It was that man, again Tait who fired out the bulls top and middle order with 5-65. The Bulls were dismissed for 251 and lost by 138 runs.
South Australian super quick Shaun Tait single handedly belted Queensland during their first round Division Two first class clash on the weekend. The rejuvenated speedster broke the hearts of the Queenslanders with 7-74 in the first innings and 5-65 in the second innings. Only Martin Love (120) was able to post a triple figure score, although Symonds (72) and Noffke (70) did their best to save the side in the second innings, but both fell victim to the remorseless Tait.
South Australia had no hesitation in batting on a wicket that looked as batsman friendly as an U/12 spin bowler. Bichel picked up the early wicket of Cosgrove for 10, but that would be Queensland's last joy for a while as Matthew Elliot (82) and Darren Lehmann (145) combined for a 156 run partnership. Noffke (6-70) was the man to break the partnership as Elliot mistimed a pull shot that balloned to Noffke who barely had to move to take an easy catch. That was the only joy for the Queenslanders for another 110 runs as Lehmann and Callum Ferguson (62) settled in on a very good deck. It was Noffke again who had the breaktrhough as he trapped Lehmann in front 5 short of his 150. Early on day two Queensland were able to pick up regular wickets and restrict what looked to be a 500 plus score to 381. Noffke was the chief destroyer with six wickets and Bichel the other main wicket taker with 3-75.
A solid start to the Queensland first innings was provided by openers Matthew Hayden (42)and Shane Watson (25). Watson, in particular, punished Tait's early erraticness. However, the big quick had revenge removing both batsmen. Love batted brilliantly for his 120 has wickets fell around him. He received some support from the lower order, Noffke with 45 and wicket keeper MacDonald with 46, but the Bulls were left with a defecit of 34.
Early wickets were needed from Queensland in the second innings, and after a rather solid start from the South Australian openers the Bulls managed to pick up two wickets with the score on 47. Elliot was brilliantly bowled by Kasprowicz (3-79) for 23 and next ball Mark Cosgrove was run out backing up for 24. The Bulls then struggled to claim a bunch of wickets which they required, instead the Redbacks were able to provide healthy partnerships throughout the innings. Ferguson reached his second half century of the match with 62, Turton managed 51, but Goodwin was the mainstay of the innings with a fine 103. Queensland were left with 390 to win after the Redbacks were dismissed for 355.
Queensland didn't get the start they were after with Hayden (9), Watson (16) and Jimmy Jenkins (0) all back in the pavillion with the score on 40. Symonds was the rock of the middle order with 70 and found support only in Ashley Noffke who contributed with 72. It was that man, again Tait who fired out the bulls top and middle order with 5-65. The Bulls were dismissed for 251 and lost by 138 runs.