What I did on my summer holiday

[Pratters]

Originally Posted by marc71178

I'm sarcastic?!

[Blewy]

Originally Posted by marc71178

And there's another one, not as good I'm afraid, but worth a read:

F.I.F.A. - Disciplinary Council

Appeal Case 3521 - Wayne Rooney (England) Red Card vs Portugal (01/07/06)


Please state below your reason for appeal against the disciplinary action taken against you on the given date:


My Apeel by Wane Roony (age 19).

On Satdy Julie 1st I woz playin footy for Ingland aginst Porchergil in Gelson Gelshi, Jerminy in the Werld Cup Cworter-finals. It woz ded hot an norra lorra chancis had been made by harf time, tho Mr Erriksin sed we woz doin sound like an if we just kept doin wot we'd dun then weed win.

Anyway, the sekind arf started an David Bekkim ad to cum off, so he started cryin cos he's a big soft suthin tart and he weres his mississ nikkers an evrythin. After about an hour had gon an it woz still nil-nil, I got the ball in midfield like and thees too derty Portchergize gets cum flyin inter me, but the reff never give a fowl (But he woz an Arjinteenian, so wot jer expect?).

I struggild ter get loooose an in the kofushiun I muster akserdently stud on that Carvellios boli cobli testerkils but it woz an akserdint and that's the gods onnist trooth cros me hart an ope to dye. I didn't no ide dun it, I swer on me mam's life! An yer no wot all them
forriniz is like, thee start winjin if yer luk at them funny. Anyway, I'v ad werse than that playin for Croccy Comp an I didn start cryin like Coleeen wen the shops is shut. Them Porchegeeze is CHEETERS an a bunch of quegs an all.

Necst thing that Cristyano Ronnaldoe (not the fat Brizilyan feller) - hoose supposed to be me mate at Man Yernitid, is runnin to the reff an grassin' me up and evrythink. An, of korse, with the reff been an Arjee he just sends me off - burr I didn cry like that girl Bekkim, I walked off like wot a mans supposed to do and Jayme Carrigers sayin
"don wurry Wane, lad we'll kik is bleedin leggs off for yer."

Anyway, thats worr happened and that's not one word of lie there lad, onist, on me nans grave its troo. Downt believe wot the reff sez cos heez a cheetin Arjee and orl them Porchergeeze is lyars - and that Ronaldo's ded lad, I'm teelin yers that fer free. Are kids orlreddy gone down to is owse in wimslow and rote "GRASS" in ded big lettis on
the worls and me owl girl sez if she sees that Ronalodes ma in the Yernitid Players Lownge she'll birst her.

So if yer take the kard away I'll be ded grateful and me da will get yis a pint in next time youse is in the Cherry Tree on the Lanks.

Luv

Wane
XXX

Geez the English have stepped up their vocabulary since i visited there last...

Thats good that one...

[marc71178]

He's scouse, not English.

[GIMH]

**** off marc!

[BoyBrumby]

Originally Posted by Xuhaib

Is Sol Cambell from the other side??

T*ttenham? Originally, yes.

[Craig]

Originally Posted by GeraintIsMyHero

**** off marc!

[wpdavid]

Originally Posted by GeraintIsMyHero

**** off marc!

Reminds me of a bloke I used to play footie with. Legend has it the ref told him to stop swearing, so he told the ref to f**k off.

[GIMH]

LOL I didn't realsie there was anything funny about it, just sticking up for my descendants