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Phlegm's Half Arsed NZ Story Volume II

Flem274*

123/5
Bond is a pure fluke tbh. Did nothing with the bat in the English tests I've just simmed.

ICC does love its stats though so if I can keep his batting average in the thirties at least then you never know what might happen...
And yes, I did bat him up the order for the hell of it.:ph34r:
 

Flem274*

123/5
New Zealand in England: 2nd Test Match

Won the toss and elected to bat first on a very flat pitch.

New Zealand 299

Jacob Oram 76
Mathew Sinclair 53
(Don Bond a three ball duck)

Mathew Hoggard 4/92
Stephen Harmison 3/56

England 280

Stuart ****burn 72
Ian Bell 53

James Franklin 5/71
Daniel Vettori 2/52

New Zealand 456/3 dec.

Peter Fulton 219*
Stephen Fleming 145

Stephen Harmison 2/88
James Anderson 1/114

Fulton just loves touring England in ICC. I noticed in my old game he always dominated in England and the West Indies. Can't believe I managed that score. Lose too many wickets with five minutes left in a session for it to ever be that simple...somehow think things will even out in India. Fleming hit his first test runs in forever as well.

England 271/5

Stuart ****burn 82
Andrew Strauss 65

James Franklin 2/63
Daniel Vettori 2/63

Match Drawn.

New Zealand win the test series 1-0

England are far too good a side to collapse in a heap that easily, and the pitch was nice and flat so the batsmen cashed in. Franklin's 5fer in the first dig was a sensational performance and a welcome return to form given how easily Australia played him.

Fulton is a freak in England, nuff said. Was hopeful for the win as I've always found England is the first opponent I have a chance of beating (they get insanely tough once the regens come through) so it was good to see the players bring the old enemy down to size.

Must say this side, after a dire dire dire start in 2007 (losing to Bangladesh in tests ffs), have become arguably my best early team ever. Though perhaps that's to be expected now I know who the gun real life players are.
 

Flem274*

123/5
Australia in England: The Ashes 2009

1st Test

England 172

Alistair Cook 77
Kevin Pietersen 27

Shaun Tait 5/52
Brett Lee 3/37

Australia 320

Shane Watson 120
Phil Jaques 80

Mathew Hoggard 3/68
Stephen Harmison 3/81

England 291

Ian Bell 104
Michael Vaughan 69*

Shaun Tait 3/92
Brett Lee 3/98

Australia 141/6

Phil Jaques 39
Shane Watson 29

Simon Jones 3/42
Mathew Hoggard 1/17

Australia win by 4 wickets

England almost staged a big comeback there.

2nd Test

Australia 311

Mathew Hayden 77
Shane Watson 74

Mathew Hoggard 6/98
James Anderson 3/149

England 130

Chris Read 41*
Ian Bell 33

Shaun Tait 4/51
Brett Lee 3/33

Australia 155

Michael Hussey 46
Phil Jaques 30

Stephen Harmison 3/32
James Anderson 3/56

England 283

Ian Bell 94
Alistair Cook 56

Shaun Tait 7/102
Brett Lee 2/71

Australia win by 53 runs.

FMD, Tait doing this almost on his own in both games, with Lee the only backup.

Huge pressure on England going into the third test. In the 2006/07 Ashes they won 4-1 remember.

3rd Test

England 209

Kevin Pietersen 69
Ian Bell 45

Shane Watson 3/36
Nathan Bracken 3/40
Shaun Tait 2/52

Australia 147

Ricky Ponting 31
Mathew Hayden 18

Simon Jones 3/24
Mathew Hoggard 3/35

England 347

Kevin Pietersen 95
Alistair Cook 89

Paul Rofe 4/66
Brett Lee 2/78

Australia 289

Michael Hussey 124
Michael Clarke 36

Stephen Harmison 5/63
Simon Jones 3/75

England win by 120 runs

England survive with a convincing victory. Hussey had no support in the chase.

4th Test

Australia 194

Phil Jaques 74
Michael Clarke 62

Monty Panesar 5/79
Stephen Harmison 2/31

England 243

Kevin Pietersen 60
Stuart ****burn 54

Shaun Tait 7/85
Paul Rofe 2/46

Australia 142

Michael Hussey 32
Adam Gilchrist 25*

Monty Panesar 4/36
Stephen Harmison 3/44

England 96/4

Chris Read 47*
Alistair Cook 14

Brett Lee 2/25
Shaun Tait 2/30

England win by 6 wickets

Some epic sheperding there from Read. 47* (51) was outstanding looking at the other strike rates in the match.

Australia choking on the Ashes here.

5th Test: Scores currently 2-2

England 342

Michael Vaughan 78
Stuart ****burn 71

Brett Lee 4/95
Shane Watson 2/40

Australia 181

Phil Jaques 69
Adam Gilchrist 66

Simon Jones 3/34
Monty Panesar 3/65

England 250

Kevin Pietersen 78
Stuart ****burn 70

Brett Lee 4/61
Shane Watson 3/37

Australia 253

Adam Gilchrist 59
Michael Clarke 53

Monty Panesar 7/70
Stephen Harmison 2/57

England win by 158 runs.

England win the Ashes 3-2.

:laugh: One can only imagine what just happened in virtual Australia after that, not to mention virtual CricketWeb.
 
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Flem274*

123/5
New Zealand in India

1st Test Match

India 503

Rahul Dravid 178
Yalaka Rao 119
MS Dhoni 102*

Daniel Vettori 5/138
Jacob Oram 2/64

Ouch

New Zealand 381

Jesse Ryder 118
Stephen Fleming 114

Sohail Trivedi 4/60
Munaf Patel 3/94

Only two men stood up.

India 284/5 dec.

Gautum Gambhir 104
Viriender Sehwag 50

James Franklin 3/52
Jacob Oram 1/22

Spirited fightback with the ball after they cruised to 205/1, and India declared with half an hour left in Day 4.

New Zealand 175

Peter Howell 46
Brendon McCullum 43

Pragyan Ojha 8/66
Shiv Rao 1/31

India win by 231 runs.

Br00tal. India dominate at home so easily.
 

Flem274*

123/5
New Zealand in India: 2nd Test match

New Zealand 504

Stephen Fleming 109
James Franklin 100*
Shane Bond 61
Brendon McCullum 58

Pragyan Ojha 5/148
Munaf Patel 3/105

:laugh: Love my lower order. True NZ lower order that. Jimmeh's century came off about ten million balls.

India 311

Rahul Dravid 107
Jitendra Malik 101

Bruce Martin 5/86
Daniel Vettori 4/81

Great stuff from Martin. Btw, Jitendra Malik is actually a bowler (off break) who has been batting at number five in this game. His FC batting average is a whopping 49.46! First Bond now this guy! Wtf?

New Zealand 195/6 dec.

Peter Howell 68
Stephen Fleming 61

Pragyan Ojha 3/73
Shiv Rao 2/57

That innings started going to poos very quickly. Gave them 380 odd to chase on the final day.

India 162

Yalaka Rao 48
Gautum Gambhir 26

Bruce Martin 5/44
Daniel Vettori 4/81

New Zealand win by 226 runs.

Series drawn 1-1.

India can suck on that. Bruce Martin is such a champion in the subcontinent. He got smashed in the first test but boy did he pay off here. Aussie called him a hack on CW after the first test btw and called for NZ to go with four quicks.:)
 

Somerset

Cricketer Of The Year
Great victory there - Bond again contributing with the bat, fantastic. I never really used Bruce Martin all that much on any of my ICC games so its nice to see hes proving successful for your side.
 

Flem274*

123/5
My current save just loves the bowlers when they go out to bat. It's my only explanation. Jitendra Malik is such a gun. Shame his offspin sucks or he'd be major h4x.

Spitting tacks at my side atm, but that's for the next update. India smashing me was less painful.
 

Cruxdude

International Debutant
Have started a game with India and getting smashed by all and sundry in tests. It is just 2011 and Sachin has gone to the dogs. Ajinkya Rahane is proving to be good. Bowling though is truly horrible. Can't take wickets for their lives.

Went to England and had Cook and Strauss put on 200+ in almost all the tests. In one particular test tehy put on 300+ in the first and 100+ in the second. Have no idea who my best bowlers are. Harbhajan averages 35-40, Chawla 35 or so, Pathan is proving to be decent, Ishant is mediocre, Zaheer is hopeless. Need to try more of Ojha.

The team needs to pull up its socks.
 
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Flem274*

123/5
West Indies in New Zealand 2010



Ist Test Match

Teams

Chris Gayle
James Mason
Shivnarine Chanderpaul
Ryan Hinds
Brian Lara
Ramnaresh Sarwan
Carlton Baugh
Dwayne Bravo
Kyle Jeremy
Jerome Taylor
Corey Collymore

Matthew Sinclair
Peter Fulton
Stephen Fleming
Peter Howell
Jesse Ryder
Jacob Oram
Brendon McCullum
James Franklin
Daniel Vettori
Shane Bond
Bruce Martin

West Indies 479

Shivnarine Chanderpaul 173
Ryan Hinds 101
Ramnaresh Sarwan 75

Bruce Martin 3/98
Shane Bond 2/78

New Zealand 493/8 dec.

Brendon McCullum 139
Jacob Oram 135
Matthew Sinclair 57

Kyle Jeremy 4/88
Jerome Taylor 3/133

West Indies 268

Ramnaresh Sarwan 56
Chris Gayle 53

James Franklin 4/57
Bruce Martin 3/59

New Zealand 219

Matthew Sinclair 62
Peter Fulton 51

Jerome Taylor 4/62
Corey Collymore /42

West Indies win by 35 runs

:@ We were 122/0 in that chase, and we blew it! Lost ten wickets for just over 100 runs.

2nd Test Match

West Indies 136

Chris Gayle 33
Brian Lara 30

Bruce Martin 3/11
Jesse Ryder 2/17

New Zealand 437/6 dec.

Matthew Sinclair 218*
Brendon McCullum 77
Stephen Fleming 56

Kyle Jeremy 2/86
Jerome Taylor 2/89

West Indies 182

Ryan Hinds 66
Chris Gayle 28

Daniel Vettori 4/46
Bruce Martin 3/48

New Zealand win by an innings and 119 runs

Much better result.
 

Flem274*

123/5
3rd Test Match

West Indies 182

Brian Lara 42
Shivnarine Chanderpaul 41

Bruce Martin 4/52
Daniel Vettori 3/49

New Zealand 154

Peter Howell 46
Brendon McCullum 24

Amit Jaggernauth 5/33
Kyle Jeremy 2/39

West Indies 247

James Mason 114 (dropped three ****ing times!)
Brian Lara 75

Daniel Vettori 6/63
Shane Bond 2/51

New Zealand 276/3

Peter Fulton 77
Matthew Sinclair 76

New Zealand win by 7 wickets.

New Zealand win the series 2-1
 

Somerset

Cricketer Of The Year
Nice series win - after your start to the chase in the first test could well've been 3-0 as well.
 

Flem274*

123/5
Zimbabwe in New Zealand 2010

1st Test Match

New Zealand 550/5 dec.

Jesse Ryder 208
Peter Howell 206

Hilary Matanga 4/175
Luther Mutyambizi 1/24

Zimbabwe 97

Luther Mutyambizi 36
Vusi Sibanda 16

James Franklin 6/59
Shane Bond 2/21

Zimbabwe 378

Tatenda Taibu 88
Vusi Sibanda 53
Hilary Matanga 52

Bruce Martin 2/90
Daniel Vettori 2/91

New Zealand win by an innings and 75 runs

2nd Test Match

Zimbabwe 324

Luther Mutyambizi 68
Vusi Sibanda 51

Daniel Vettori 4/93
Gareth Shaw 3/59

New Zealand 563/6 dec.

Peter Howell 200*
Matthew Sinclair 104
Jesse Ryder 70
James Franklin 60*

Elliot Chademamna 2/113
Trevor Garwe 2/145

Zimbabwe 325

Tinashe Hove 77
Luther Mutyambizi 60

Daniel Vettori 4/83
Gareth Shaw 3/80

New Zealand 92/1

Peter Fulton 42
Matthew Sinclair 48*

Neil Cilliers 1/32

New Zealand win by 9 wickets

New Zealand win the series 2-0.

They gave me a bit of a scrap with the bat, but their bowling was dire. Peter Howell:laugh:

Had a few retirements at seasons end. Fleming AND Vettori is gone. Dan the Man ditched me at the age of 31 after averaging 21 with the ball last year. WAC. It better have been a career ending back injury or something.

Stephen Fleming

Age 37
Wellington
Debut 1993
LHB

Tests

130 tests
8535 runs @ 40.26
17 hundreds
46 fifties
HS 274*
173 catches

First Class

295 matches
19729 runs @ 43.84
21 hundreds
106 fifties
HS 274*
370 catches

Daniel Vettori

Age 31
Debut 1997
Northern Districts
99 tests
LHB
SLA

Tests

2821 runs @ 25.41
2 hundreds
15 fifties
HS 137*
45 catches

285 wickets @ 33.14
RPO 2.65
17 five wicket hauls
2 ten wicket hauls
BBI 7/71

First Class

188 matches
5556 runs @ 25.84
4 hundreds
26 fifties
HS 165
98 catches

633 wickets @ 31.79
RPO 2.70
36 five wicket hauls
2 ten wicket hauls
BBI 7/71
 

Somerset

Cricketer Of The Year
Vettori retiring at 31 seems a bit odd - you're unlucky to have him retire that early. Pretty comprehensive wins over Zimbabwe and that means you've got four test wins in a row; wonder how many times thats happened over NZ cricket history. ;)
 

Flem274*

123/5
He's currently ranked number two in the world.

Taufeeq Umar is first.:huh:

Anyway, now I'm touring Zimbabwe

New Zealand is Zimbabwe 2010

New Zealand Squad

Peter Fulton (Canterbury)
Jamie How (Central Districts)
Peter Howell (Auckland)
Tim Lythe (Auckland)
Nick Horsley (Northern Districts)
Mathew Sinclair (Central Districts)
Brendon McCullum (Canterbury)
Lou Vincent (Auckland)
Chris Jowell (Otago)
Jesse Ryder (Wellington)
Jacob Oram (Central Districts)
James Franklin (Canterbury)
Mark Gillespie (Wellington)
Gareth Shaw (Otago)
Ian Cook (Canterbury)
Ryan Heads (Northern Districts)
Trent Thaw (Otago)
Will Darkes (Northern Districts)

Lots of new faces in there. Chris Jowell is Otago's new wicketkeeper, and he averaged 34 in his first season, so he's been brought over as backup (McCullum now averages over 40 in FC cricket and 38 in tests!). Ian Cook is a Cantabrian legspinner who averaged 29 in his first season. Ryan Heads is a young seamer who took 70 wickets at 20 last year for ND and averages 28 overall. Will Darkes averaged 28 last year and 32 overall with the ball. Trent Thaw averages 30 with the ball for Otago after one season, so I brought him over (The remaining sub 30 bowlers never gave me much joy in other games).

Mathew Sinclair takes over the captaincy.:D

New Zealand Team

Peter Fulton
Jamie How
Mathew Sinclair (c)
Peter Howell
Jesse Ryder (6)
Jacob Oram (5)
Brendon McCullum (wk)
James Franklin (1)
Mark Gillespie (3)
Ryan Heads (4)
Gareth Shaw (2)

1st Test Match

New Zealand 508

Peter Fulton 154
Brendon McCullum 145*

Prosper Utseya 6/143
Thomas Dangarembizi 3/135

Zimbabwe 203

Gavin Ewing 87*
Vusi Sibanda 35

Ryan Heads 3/30
Gareth Shaw 3/56

Zimbabwe 176

Vusi Sibanda 48
Joubarmuil Patel 38

Gareth Shaw 5/51
James Franklin 2/33

New Zealand win by an innings and 129 runs.

Pretty straightforward, but Zimbabwe has ****ed selection. Four of their top five FC batsmen haven't played a single test match ffs.
 

Somerset

Cricketer Of The Year
Another huge win, good stuff. Might be a chance to try out a few younger players for the rest of the series if you're winning so comfortably with your strongest side.
 

Flem274*

123/5
2nd Test Match

Zimbabwe 73

Tinashe Hove 42*
Tinotenda Mawoyo 13

Mark Gillespie 6/18
Gareth Shaw 3/23

New Zealand 476/8 dec.

Jesse Ryder 170
Jacob Oram 111
Mathew Sinclair 59
Jamie How 54
Brendon McCullum 50

Thomas Dangarembizi 3/154
Anthony Ireland 2/73

Zimbabwe 484

Gavin Ewing 171
Tinotenda Mawoyo 145

Gareth Shaw 5/128
Mark Gillespie 3/85

New Zealand 82/2

Peter Fulton 30*
Mathew Sinclair 21

Neil Cilliers 2/13

New Zealand win by 8 wickets
 

Flem274*

123/5
In other news, the West Indies toured Bangladesh and got thumped 2-0. The West Indian bowlers went well but their batsmen didn't manage one innings over 200.
 

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