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Paper vs bum-gun vs bidet vs hands to clean your backside

SillyCowCorner1

International Coach
My grandpa used to take a jug of water with him (or kept a jug filled with water) to the latrine in the backyard everytime he does his business.

There is no other better alternative to water...
 

vcs

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Doing your business in an Indian train is an extremely tricky task. Not only do you have to maintain perfect balance in the squat while the coach rocks back and forth, Indian Railways in all their wisdom have decided to chain that mug (who even steals a mug from a train toilet FFS?) to the wall. So the thing just doesn't reach where you want it to reach. All the time you're also hoping that the rickety latch on the door holds firm.
 

sledger

Spanish_Vicente
Telling that the main contribution to this thread has been from posters based in Asia and the Subcontinent tbh.

The posters from civilised countries, on the other hand, have felt no need to contribute because they have already attained an advanced level of sanitary procedure, and answers to questions like "how do I clean my anus properly?" are so obvious and self-evident that any discussion is entirely unnecessary.
 

Shri

Cricket Web: All-Time Legend
Doing your business in an Indian train is an extremely tricky task. Not only do you have to maintain perfect balance in the squat while the coach rocks back and forth, Indian Railways in all their wisdom have decided to chain that mug (who even steals a mug from a train toilet FFS?) to the wall. So the thing just doesn't reach where you want it to reach. All the time you're also hoping that the rickety latch on the door holds firm.
why do you think they sell those water bottles at the railway station shops

i used to get a massive 5 litre can to do the deed

the things we do for a clean asshole
 

sledger

Spanish_Vicente
why do you think they sell those water bottles at the railway station shops

i used to get a massive 5 litre can to do the deed

the things we do for a clean asshole
Only in India eh? Sounds like a paradise.
 

sledger

Spanish_Vicente
I mean buying bottles of water to pour into your arse, good grief, sort your country out ffs
 

Shri

Cricket Web: All-Time Legend
when in rome ****s

water is fine for high fibre indian food

tp if your diet is mostly meat
 

Daemon

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Quite fitting that sledger has the most number of posts in a thread about faeces
 

Burgey

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ATG post. Bum guns and good food are the only 2 things that make life in the SC worthwhile. Well, sometimes when it gets very hot your cornhole can get sterilized but that's a price worth paying.
You literally just said one of the only good things about living on the SC is cleaning your arse, as though doing so is somehow a luxury or a privilege.

This is an extraordinary thread. Hard to believe cleaning your arse is such a big deal for people and not just something you do without having to think about it.
 

RossTaylorsBox

International Captain
You guys been to Japan?

The toilets have sprays built in, you can adjust the temperature and pressure and some even play music.

Evolution of man is basically

Don’t wash your butt > leaves > toilet paper > bum guns > bidets > japanese toilets
They're called washlets and I'm posting from my one right now. Bow down peasants and take a whiff of my freshly perfumed anus.
 

Red Hill

The artist formerly known as Monk
I will re-shower in the morning if my routine goes out of whack, and especially if the day before had not been particularly fibrous.

Generally my mornings are clockwork. Wake, fruit, toast, coffee, ****, shower, brush teeth, car, work. Everything in sequence means everything is clean.

If you're ****ting on the train or in the middle of the day at work, you're doing life wrong.
 

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