• Welcome to the Cricket Web forums, one of the biggest forums in the world dedicated to cricket.

    You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join the Cricket Web community today!

    If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us.

Australian fans complain about bland Indian team

Burgey

Request Your Custom Title Now!
"Same old whinging nobodies", said New England grazier Tom Bullock.

"They come here every time saying they'll win and after six days' cricket they've been rodgered and never stop complaining", mused Gympie newsagent Kylie Scragg.

"Why do they always say 'This time we have the bowlers!' before their attack all average over 80?" asked Kalgoorlie gold miner Steve Jones.

"Sorry. Who?" - unnamed inner-Melbourne hipster barrista.

"It's a bit rich that they complain and want everything laid out for them when they come here, yet they have to kick aside the beggars to walk to the shops back home" - Tony Morrison, Sutherland via Warringah.

“They’re complaining about the food here being bland, yet Chennai is supposed to be their most liveable city and it has an open sewer next to its cricket stadium. What know they of food, drinkable water or indeed civilisation?” - Burgey, Doyen of CW; while having dinner at Manjit’s in Darling St, Balmain.

"I think they're right. Australia has a lot to learn about accommodating overseas guests. They should be given the spiciest food available and if they aren't happy then Australia needs to forfeit to let them win, so the world knows we are good people That's what I used to tell the girls when I was at school at Loretto, and I stand by it because I know all about the real world" - Greens Candidate for Surry Hills, Stephanie Rothman-Smythe.
 
Last edited:

jimmy101

Cricketer Of The Year
I happen to know that unnamed Melbourne hipster personally. Probably not the best person to interview on the topic at hand. Bloke wouldn't know a cricket bat from a moustache comb.
 

Athlai

Not Terrible
Goodbye icing cake ratio, hello Butter Chicken team dynamics.

Warner is the spice
Smith is the chicken
Lyon and Hazlewood are the cream
Starc, Cummins are the garlic naan
Paine, khawaja, the Marshes and Bancroft are the rice
 
Last edited:

Athlai

Not Terrible
I was going to make them the unasked for and unwanted popadoms but realised that some people may rate popadoms and didnt want to give them the pleasure
 

jimmy101

Cricketer Of The Year
The Marshes may very well be just garnishes. You're better off pushing them to the side of your plate so they don't interfere with the meal proper.
 

Gnske

Cricket Web: All-Time Legend
Imagine being anti-rice when really without it, there is no dish most of the time.
 

Athlai

Not Terrible
Imagine being anti-rice when really without it, there is no dish most of the time.
I'm not saying you should just do without the rice entirely, but unless you're a sicko like Jimmy, you want the rice to balance the dish. Too much rice is a bad thing, just like the Marsh brothers, but we all enjoy a cheeky bit of Paine.
 

Top