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Thread: Mental Health Thread

  1. #31
    International Regular anil1405's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uppercut View Post
    Yeah this is a great thread. Really liking anil’s posts especially. Hope we’re not ruining it now that half the posts are pointing out how good it is.
    For all those who have suffered alone any sort of positive words sound like gold.

    The amount of **** people with a mental disorder go through is ridiculous and I appreciate everyone doing that for their bravery. On top of that we have to act in front of others as if everything is going fine with us which eats up more of our energy so it sucks even more.
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  2. #32
    International Coach StephenZA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anil1405 View Post
    5 minutes at the start of the day....thats where I am losing my battle. I get sucked into **** early in the morning and half my day gets ruined. On the contrary as you said if we own the first 5 minutes then that will do us a lot of good. And how we spend the last 30 minutes before we sleep also plays a big part.
    I find that routine helps for early morning. I have a very particular routine for the first hour or so from the minute I awake, never stay in bed. This distracts from the early morning thoughts and allows me to get on with the day as needed. Evening is a bit more of a problem, I tend to read something light and frivolous that is distracting, until I`m tired enough to just fall asleep.

    Quote Originally Posted by anil1405 View Post
    Your supermarket example is so apt for people with anxiety, we could be pumped up and happy one moment and then without a valid reason everything looks downwards all of a sudden.
    Probably one of the most disconcerting parts for people looking in, is the extreme mood swings that depression and anxiety produce. And then knowing this you trying to maintain a mood so people don't get thrown or upset, is exhausting.

    My personal biggest challenge I face that affects my life daily, is probably concentration, I need lots of that and 10 years ago I could concentrate on something for many hours, now if I can get though 30 min I've done well. My medication does not help with this though.

    In the end we all have to try find suitable coping mechanisms without disrupting our lives. But a true solution is generally what vcs mentioned, removing yourself from the what causes the anxiety and depression and changing the way you live, at least until you can recover, (just to be clear I am not talking isolation, that is a coping mechanism that effectively can destroy your life). Unfortunately practically just changing how you live is not always possible; but becoming aware of it and slowly changing your life is the only real way of dealing with these issues because coping mechanism are not generally long term solutions; they are exactly that, coping rather than dealing with.
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  3. #33
    International Debutant MrPrez's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anil1405 View Post
    Good on you mate for getting treatment and great to know its well under control. How long have you suffered before you decided to get it treated? Don't mind me asking this but your experience could help other people who might be going through what you have in the past.
    Way longer than I should have. I got treated towards the end of my third year of university, but first started suffering when I was 14. So that's about 6 or 7 years of it.

    Perhaps the main reason I didn't get it sorted earlier is that I didn't know what it was. I came across Pure O OCD online and immediately realised that this was my exact problem. And not in a dodgy self-diagnosis online way. It's the sort of thing that if you've suffered it, you absolutely 110% know.

    Within days I'd visited a doctor, got a prescription, and noticed huge differences within weeks. I was lucky that meds seem to work well enough for me, but CBT therapy would totally be worth it too if the meds weren't enough. You realise how silly it is to even consider letting your pride overcome your need for help once you've been helped - it's a completely new lease on life.
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  4. #34
    International Regular anil1405's Avatar
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    https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/exp...alk/e/59635394

    Came across this lovely podcast about men's mental health where three guys from UK have decided to open up about their individual journeys and raise awareness about mental health for men.


  5. #35
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    Interested to know what we can do to help those around us who are suffering

  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Daemon View Post
    Interested to know what we can do to help those around us who are suffering
    Encourage them to get help and NEVER EVER SAY ANYTHING THAT MIGHT BE INTERPRETED AS INDICATING THEY SHOULD NOT GET HELP
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  7. #37
    International Regular anil1405's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Daemon View Post
    Interested to know what we can do to help those around us who are suffering
    As test fan pointed out, encourage them to seek help and tell them how strong they are for battling their mental issues. Its not just the mental disorder but trying to put up a normal/happy face in front of everyone also eats up all your energy. So if there is someone who supports them through their journey that makes things easy. It is tough to empathise with them though, as you wouldn't understand what they are going through.

    It is tough to think of what else you could say to them as the subject is so untouched in general, but there are many things you SHOULDN'T be telling them. To name a few:

    - Things like just be positive and you will get through it. If it was that easy then they wouldn't be suffering with a disorder in the first place.
    - Its just in your head. This freaks them out.
    - You need to let it go.
    - I know how it feels to be depressed/anxious. Everyone feels depressed/stressed in life at some point but thats not the same as having a Mental Disorder. (I am posting a video below that differentiates between normal stress and having a Anxiety Disorder)
    - You always seem happy and cheerful, why do you think you feel the way you do.
    - You are probably just going through a bad phase


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  8. #38
    International Debutant Bijed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anil1405 View Post
    The first step is acceptance. Accepting that you have it is tough but thats where the journey towards recovery begins
    Yeah, the thing I did wrong for years was refuse to admit myself that what I was going through (frequent, as in multiple per day, panic attacks with accompanied physical sickness, plus essentially being unable to face interacting with people) wasn't just the norm - I would try to hide it and I told myself that presumably this happened to everyone all the time. In reality, I coudn't hope to keep it hidden and I knew really that it wasn't just a normal thing but I just kept trying to lie to myself for ages until someone basically just (sensitively) told me that it was obvious what I was going through). For me, just talking about it, whilst not easy at first, was the biggest single thing I did to put it (mostly) behind me. Lots of other factor too, of course, including joining this forum, as it meant I got more social interaction but without also triggering my symptoms like physically going out socially often would. I'll echo others' sentiments by saying what a good thread this is (and a good blog too)
    Last edited by Bijed; 15-05-2019 at 02:14 PM.
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  9. #39
    I can't believe I ate the whole thing NZTailender's Avatar
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    Having had agoraphobia which saw me a shut in for a few years, and ongoing depression and anxiety which I can successfully manage, the advice I can give is have patience. There is no quick 'cure'. When I was younger all the professionals I saw said it would take time, which bothered me as I obviously wanted a quick fix. Chipping away at it over time, I've gotten to a place I had never thought was achievable, and looking back, I can see the people who said it would take time and work were right. But that's not to say it was an easy road, either. I've had more breakdowns than I can count and those setbacks, which I thought meant my efforts were a waste of time, were necessary to actually see limits and push them gradually until I overcame them.

    People will tell you medication is poison and doctors, psychologists, psychiatrists etc. are charlatans who just want to sell you drugs. Ignore them. If I didn't have the help of medical professionals I'd still be stuck indoors all day afraid of the outside world. If I didn't have meds at the time to curb anxieties I would't have been able to make steps to break the cycle of thinking that caused a lot of anxieties. I've managed to get to a place where I don't need medication anymore, but I needed them for a long while, and they helped.

    Everyone's journey is different. You'll have your own, and talking about it is one of the best way to try and figure things out, because we're not born with all the answers.

    Best of luck.
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  10. #40
    International Regular anil1405's Avatar
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    Patience is indeed very key and for people to realise and implement this is pretty tough during the rough phase though. Good to see that you had people who supported you NZT.

    There are mixed responses to medications but the stigma attached to it is that medicines are bad and won't work which is absolutely wrong. Maybe not for all but it does work. Couple of years back I used to wake up every morning with a rising heartbeat and feeling of extreme anxiety and when I started taking medication it did calm me down. I still continue to take medication but I realise that I have to do certain things to get my life back on track rather than relying on my medication alone.

    My problem right now is that my satisfaction levels in life are close to zero, and always have been, but I am eager to achieve something in life. This enthusiasm is giving me anxiety coupled with the fact that I have this obsession to overthink about every little thing.
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  11. #41
    International Regular anil1405's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bijed View Post
    Yeah, the thing I did wrong for years was refuse to admit myself that what I was going through (frequent, as in multiple per day, panic attacks with accompanied physical sickness, plus essentially being unable to face interacting with people) wasn't just the norm - I would try to hide it and I told myself that presumably this happened to everyone all the time. In reality, I coudn't hope to keep it hidden and I knew really that it wasn't just a normal thing but I just kept trying to lie to myself for ages until someone basically just (sensitively) told me that it was obvious what I was going through). For me, just talking about it, whilst not easy at first, was the biggest single thing I did to put it (mostly) behind me. Lots of other factor too, of course, including joining this forum, as it meant I got more social interaction but without also triggering my symptoms like physically going out socially often would. I'll echo others' sentiments by saying what a good thread this is (and a good blog too)
    Whats your situation now? Are you comfortable talking about it to your near and dear ones? Do you feel better about yourself?

  12. #42
    International Debutant Bijed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anil1405 View Post
    Whats your situation now? Are you comfortable talking about it to your near and dear ones? Do you feel better about yourself?
    I still don't always find it easy to talk about it for the first time with any given person, but once I have, I'm so much more comfortable talking about it with them again. It's helped a lot that everyone that I have spoken to about it has been sensitive and respectful. And yeah, I feel vastly better about myself
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  13. #43
    International Regular anil1405's Avatar
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    The 3 guys from UK I spoke about above in this page have also started a Facebook group named "MENTalk" to raise awareness and be there for one another. So that group could be of help to anyone if needed.

  14. #44
    International 12th Man Kirkut's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sledger View Post
    Mental illness is a terrible nasty thing. But this is a good thread.
    Worse than physical pain. Physical pain in it's extreme form is terrible but body learns to adapt to it with time, the body never adapts to mental illness which is why chaos never goes away.

  15. #45
    International 12th Man Kirkut's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anil1405 View Post
    For all those who have suffered alone any sort of positive words sound like gold.

    The amount of **** people with a mental disorder go through is ridiculous and I appreciate everyone doing that for their bravery. On top of that we have to act in front of others as if everything is going fine with us which eats up more of our energy so it sucks even more.
    I share my personal experience - be kind to yourself, it's okay to slow down and avoid taking life seriously.

    The root cause of this is the cut throat competitive culture we live in. Everyone wants to be an uber alpha like Harvey Specter all time, no one wants to be the beta mediocre. Very few accept that humans are imperfect.
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