I have a dilemma and have returned to the oracle, the font of morality of cricketweb to express myself to see if I can find solace in the opinions of some people I've never met.
Way back I've been annoyed at my male friends planning a holiday, and inviting me but not my girlfriend. I've heard things like, "She'll ruin the atmosphere", "We just want it to be the guys", and I've been so irate at this tirade against my girlfriend's mere presence that I ended up not going myself.
Now it's not like she is a social non-entity, or a moodkiller. My friends constantly express how great she is, and can we come over for dinner, drinks, etc. But head to warmer climes and it seems the rules change.
Now the only reason I could think for a bunch of guys not wanting their girls to be around for such an extended period, is so we can all go out in the evening and have sex with other girls without getting caught. If they want to be away from their girls that much, and yes that's obviously what people want from time to time (and what's wrong with a weekend of golf or cricket for that?), then I question why they are with them in the first place.
Last night the boot was on the other foot. After offering to drive my partner's friends (all female) to Germany so we can go mountain biking, now it turns out I'm not welcome. "He'll change the atmosphere." These are people who haven't even met me as I've been living in a different country. I thought it would be a good opportunity to get to know everyone and now they would rather pay double and take the train than have the dangers of a male presence around. Perhaps they want their menstrual cycles to link up so they can talk about what a dick I was for having the audacity to live near my girlfriend.
What are the rules here? I'm not a needy guy, I appreciate people need time apart. I get hen and stag parties and the like, just don't know why it's in fashion for people to essentially ban significant others on such a frequent basis when you're planning to relax in a foreign country.