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Thread: Best Simpsons Quotes EVER

  1. #31
    International Vice-Captain open365's Avatar
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    Sep 2004
    Quote Originally Posted by DJellett
    "Max Power, he's the guy with the name you'd like to touch BUT YOU MUSNT TOUCH"

    Homer-'how ironic,he'e blind after enjoying a life of being able to see'

  2. #32
    International Captain Deja moo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Navi Mumbai , India
    Bart: "I am so smart, I am so smart, S-M-R-T - I mean S-M-A-R-T!"

    Ralph: "thank you supernintendo Chalmers"

    Grandpa Simpson: "My Homer is not a Communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a Communist, but he is NOT a **** star."

    Homer: "If The Flintstones has taught us anything, it's that pelicans can be used to mix cement."

    Sideshow Bob: "I once tried to kill the world's greatest lover, but I realised there's laws against suicide."

    Johnny Tightlips: "I ain't sayin nothin"

    Homer: " I need some advice...for my friend.., er,.. Joey.. Jo Jo.. Junior... Shabidoo.."
    Moe: "Thats the worst name I ever heard!"
    A man cries and runs out of the bar.
    Barney: "Hey! come back, Joey Jo Jo!"

    Comic Book Guy: "Inspired by the most logical race in the galaxy, The Vulcans, breeding will be permitted once every seven years. For many of you, this will mean much less breeding. For me, much much more."

    Homer: It seems that the cat has been caught by the very person who was trying to catch him.
    Skinner: How ironic.

    Homer: Lisa, If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.

    Mr. Burns: And a stunt like that impresses people?
    Homer: Oh yeah. And I'm not easily impressed. Wow! A blue car!

    Comic Book Guy: Internet King - maybe he can provide faster nudity.

    Mr. Burns: Nonsense! Dogs are idiots! Think about it, Smithers. If I came into your house and started sniffing at your crotch and slobbering all over you, what would you say?
    Smithers: If you did it, sir?

    Homer: I'm not normally a religious man, but... if you're up there, save me, Superman!
    Millhouse: you know when your dog ate my goldfish bart and you told me i never had a goldfish, then why did i have the bowl bart! why did i have the bowl!!!!
    Member of the MSC and the AAAS
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    Waughney : We are well taken care of here at the Rehab centre.

  3. #33
    Request Your Custom Title Now! Top_Cat's Avatar
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    Feb 2002
    Marburg, Germany
    Contestant: "You said if I slept with you, it'd help my career!"
    DUFFMAN: "Duffman says a lotta things! OHHH YEAAAAH!!!!"

  4. #34
    U19 12th Man The Foxtrot's Avatar
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    Jan 2005

    haha that one got my for ages.....
    Leeds United will make it back to the Premier League
    "You tried and you failed miserably. Lesson here is never try"

  5. #35
    International Debutant Natman20's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Auckland, NZ
    The Full Qoute from homers song:

    "Max Power, hes the man whos name you'd like to touch, But you MUSN'T TOUCH! His name sounds good in your ear, but when you say it you musn't FEAR! Cause his name can be said by anyone."

  6. #36
    State Vice-Captain Armadillo's Avatar
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    Jan 2004
    Literate Essex- yes, it does exist!
    "Duffman is thrusting in the direction of the problem"
    Member of LSU (bowl part time pies)

    RIP Fardin

  7. #37
    U19 12th Man The Foxtrot's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Squirmy Wormy Maggie
    Climbs out of Daddy's hands
    Daddy feels rejected
    He's gonna eat some cake...

  8. #38
    U19 12th Man AndrewM's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Woman: "Hi, i'm from ---, specializing in treatment for bald, impotent men."
    Homer: "Well, i am bald and important!"

    Director: Up and atom!
    McBain: Up and at them.
    Director: Up and ATOM!
    McBain: Up and atdem!
    Director: UP AND ATOM!
    McBain: UP AND ATEM!
    Director: .. Better.
    "Harmison runs in now....a comical pile of sawdust behind him.."

    -Henry Blofield, overheard, 4th Ashes test

  9. #39
    Global Moderator vic_orthdox's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Melbourne, Australia
    Boom chika boom chika bom che boom.

    I'm Mr. Plow, and I'm here to say
    That I'm the plowiest guy in the USA
    I've got a big plow and I move a lotta things
    Just like your car, if you have one.

  10. #40
    U19 12th Man danish's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Chelmsford, Essex
    Fat Tony: "It has been decided. After much deliberation, our mafia website will now be called"

    Associate: "Hey Tony, I thought you said Troy Mclure was dead."
    Fat Tony: "I didn't. I said he sleeps with the fishes.

    Chief Wiggum: "Great work Lou, I'll have you promoted to sergeant for this."
    Lou: "But Chief-"
    Chief Wiggum: "Quiet Lou, or I'll have you demoted to sergeant so fast it'll make your head spin."

    Movie critic: "Hey McBain, your shoes are undone."
    (12 hours later)
    McBain: "On closer inspection, they appear to be loafers."
    Q: What's your favourite animal?
    Steve Waugh: Merv Hughes.

    Fred Trueman:

    That was a tremendous six, the ball was still in the air as it went over the boundary.
    That's what cricket is all about. Two batsmen pitting their wits against one another.
    Anyone foolish enough to predict the outcome of this match is a fool.
    Unless something happens that we can't predict, I don't think a lot will happen.

    Ian Blackwell: It's just understanding foods and what to eat at certain times.

  11. #41
    International Debutant DJellett's Avatar
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    Feb 2004
    Melbourne, Australia
    *Homer runs past naked*

    Patty: There goes the last threat of my hetrosexuality"
    Dylan Hooper-Jellett
    CWCA Chairman

    Want to be the next Bradman - of the forum?
    Simmed Cricket. Real Fun.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Voltman View Post
    Melicous? Is that a nasty, yet tasty, comment?

  12. #42
    Banned squeakyclean's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Camelford, Cornwall
    There's quite a few.....

    Marge: Why all the black, Homer?

    Homer: I could ask you the same thing. Why all the pearls? Why all the hair? Why anything?

    Lisa: You look pretty shifty, Dad.

    Homer: No YOU look pretty shifty, Lisa!

    Bart: What's going on, Homer?

    Homer: Oh nothing, I'm just going out to perform certain deeds. Heheh, suckers.

    Abe: Not many people know this, but I owned the first radio in Springfield. Not much on the air then, just Edison reciting the alphabet over and over. 'A' he'd say. Then 'B'. 'C' would usually follow...

    Bart: I’ll take up smoking, and give that up!

    Homer: Congratulations boy, giving up smoking is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. Have a dollar.

    Lisa: But he didn’t do anything!

    Homer: Didn’t he Lisa? Didn’t he? ……Hey wait! He didn’t! *snatches dollar back*

    Marge: The Plant called today and said that if you don’t come in tomorrow, don’t bother going in on Monday.

    Homer: Woohoo! Four-day weekend!

    Lionel Hutz: This is the biggest case of fraugalant advertising since my lawsuit against the film the Neverending Story!

    Homer: In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.

    Homer: Ah! Bees! Ouch! They’re defending themselves somehow!

    Abe: My story begins in Nineteen dickety two. We had to say "dickety" because the Kaiser had stolen our word for "twenty." I chased him down the road but gave up after dickety-six miles...

    Homer: Well I’m not going to sleep in the same bed with someone who thinks I’m lazy! I’m going to get out of bed, go downstairs, unfold the couch……..ah the hell with it. *goes to sleep*

    FBI Guy: Now remember, your name, is Mr Thompson.

    Homer: OK

    FBI Guy: Hello, Mr Thompson.

    Homer: …..

    *Hours later*

    FBI Guy: OK, when I say “Hello Mr Thompson” and press down on your foot, you say “Hello”

    Homer: Got ya.


    Homer: ………(to other FBI guy) I think he’s talking to you.

    Bart: Take him away boys.

    Wiggum: Hey! That's my job! Bake him away toys.

    Lou: Uh...what chief?

    Wiggum: ....Just do what the kid says.

    And finally….

    Homer: I want to set the record straight. I thought, the cop, was a PROSTITUTE.
    Last edited by squeakyclean; 19-01-2006 at 03:04 PM.

  13. #43
    Cricketer Of The Year Kweek's Avatar
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    Apr 2004
    Haarlem, The Netherlands
    P.S. We beat England at Lord's
    Member of the RTDAS.
    Member of the ESAS - Edgar Schiferli Appreciation Society
    President of the DNAS - Dirk Nannes Appreciation Society
    Member of the CW Colts!

    Quote Originally Posted by Burgey View Post
    I think it's really disappointing of her - would only take a minute or two of her time....
    Quote Originally Posted by luffy View Post
    Wishful thinking on your behalf.

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