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Thread: Twilight bores man to death

  1. #1
    RTDAS pasag's Avatar
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    Twilight bores man to death

    Rest In Peace Craigos
    2003-2012

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    Hall of Fame Member Smudge's Avatar
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    Saw this as a win-win situation, tbh. Any bloke who loves Twilight isn't much of a loss.

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    Hall of Fame Member Son Of Coco's Avatar
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    Love the thread title.
    "What is this what is this who is this guy shouting what is this going on in here?" - CP. (re: psxpro)

    R.I.P Craigos, you were a champion bloke. One of the best

    R.I.P Fardin 'Bob' Qayyumi

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  4. #4
    RTDAS pasag's Avatar
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    Apparently he just couldn't stake it any more.


  5. #5
    Hall of Fame Member FaaipDeOiad's Avatar
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    I actually watched the first Twilight film the other day.

    Does anyone know what the deal is with all the weird facial expressions like the actors are constipated? Are they in the book too?
    I know a place where a royal flush
    Can never beat a pair

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    Global Moderator Teja.'s Avatar
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    In all seriousness, RIP.

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    Cricket Web Staff Member Burgey's Avatar
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    RIP to his friends and family
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    Cricketer Of The Year Mr Casson's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Voltman View Post
    Saw this as a win-win situation, tbh. Any bloke who loves Twilight isn't much of a loss.


    Quote Originally Posted by FaaipDeOiad View Post
    I actually watched the first Twilight film the other day.

    Does anyone know what the deal is with all the weird facial expressions like the actors are constipated? Are they in the book too?
    A quick Google search of Twilight quotes appears to indicate that constipation was indeed a major theme of the story.

    First of all, there was this:

    Quote Originally Posted by Bella, Ch. 1 P. 6
    I do a good job of blocking painful, unnecessary things from my memory.
    And who can forget this:

    Quote Originally Posted by Bella, Ch. 1 P. 9
    It was nice to be alone, not to have to smile and look pleased; a relief to stare dejectedly out the window at the sheeting rain and let just a few tears escape.
    And:

    Quote Originally Posted by Bella, Ch. 2 P. 39
    Once people start throwing wet stuff, I go inside.
    Quote Originally Posted by Edward, Ch. 5 P. 97
    So you faint at the sight of blood?
    And my personal favourites:

    Quote Originally Posted by Bella, Ch. 8 P. 161
    I wasn’t going out without taking someone with me. I tried to swallow so I could build up a decent scream.
    Quote Originally Posted by Bella, Ch. 8 P. 162
    I stared at his face in profound relief, relief that went beyond my sudden deliverance.
    'Copperfield,' said Mr. Micawber, 'farewell! Every happiness and prosperity! If, in the progress of revolving years, I could persuade myself that my blighted destiny had been a warning to you, I should feel that I had not occupied another man's place in existence altogether in vain.
    - Wilkins Micawber

  9. #9
    Cricketer Of The Year Adamc's Avatar
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    Haha Casson, gun.

    Quote Originally Posted by Burgey View Post
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    Haha, definitely my favourite new CW meme this.
    "Under the spreading chestnut tree,
    I sold you and you sold me."

  10. #10
    Cricket Web Staff Member Burgey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FaaipDeOiad View Post
    I actually watched the first Twilight film the other day.

    Does anyone know what the deal is with all the weird facial expressions like the actors are constipated? Are they in the book too?
    I haven't seen any of them. Is there a redeeming feature to them at all?

    And by redeeming feature, I mean noodz.

  11. #11
    World Traveller Craig's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Burgey View Post
    RIP to his friends and family
    Haha, I'm never going to live that down.
    Beware the lollipop of mediocrity. Lick once and you suck forever...

    RIP Fardin Qayyumi, a true legend of CW

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  12. #12
    Hall of Fame Member NZTailender's Avatar
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    Haha. Heard this on the radio so many times today. First thing that came to mind was 'is it that bad?' and then 'I'd probably die of embarrassment if anyone ever caught me watching it'.

    But yeah, overall a bit of a sad story. Cause of death not known yet. Putting a fiver on an aneurysm.[/insensitive]

    Quote Originally Posted by Voltman View Post
    Saw this as a win-win situation, tbh. Any bloke who loves Twilight isn't much of a loss.
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  13. #13
    Hall of Fame Member FaaipDeOiad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Burgey View Post
    I haven't seen any of them. Is there a redeeming feature to them at all?

    And by redeeming feature, I mean noodz.
    Only seen the first one but it's ****ing awful. I guess if there is a redeeming feature its the hilarious awfulness of it all, but it's a trainwreck of a film.

    "You're like my... own personal brand... of heroin..."

  14. #14
    Banned Pratters's Avatar
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    I don't know what Twilight is all about and I don't care. Seriously, can the ****ing thing.

  15. #15
    Cricket Web Staff Member Burgey's Avatar
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    Hmm, think I'll give it a miss then.

    While on the subject of over paid, under talented actors, saw that fella from Gossip Girl at a restaurant I was at last week for lunch.

    Not sure his name, looked a ponce.

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