Sports writer, preferably free-lance and independently wealthy so it doesn't matter if I decide not to write for a while
Pro golfer - it's an old joke, but a nearly 40 year old white man could dress as a black pimp and get away with it
Wouldn't have minded running an elite tourism business, doing tours up and down the East Coast of Australia, be it day trips out of Sydney, or taking people from OS to some exclusive joints around the traps
Bovine proctologist (had to do those exams at school, not a great look when you're trying to impress a girl in your class and you're up a cow's arse to your armpit).
Working on the loading dock at a large commercial bakery (did it in years 11 and 12 at school one night a week). Induced me to study harder.