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Thread: Phrases and expressions that make you chuckle

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    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend Uppercut's Avatar
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    Phrases and expressions that make you chuckle

    Inspired by Brumby's signature, Mike Selvey describing Ian Bell as "having a mentality so flabby it may require liposuction." Those little words and phrases slipped casually into pieces of writing or conversation that crack me up. Others include:

    "...members of the tax-dodging fraternity..." - Brumby himself on students

    "Shark Biscuit" - General term for a person bad at surfing

    "...could lower the tone of a spitting contest..." - Used to describe Allen Stanford immediately after the players wives fiasco

    Do post any such phrases you've encountered on your travels.
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    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    Vaguely rude synonyms always make me smile.

    -Like a French kiss at a family reunion. (unwelcome)

    -If I fell in a bucket of tits I'd come out sucking my thumb (I'm unlucky)

    -Like pushing poo uphill (impossible and/or pointless)

    - I felt like a spare prick at an orgy (my presence wasn'y strictly necessary)
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    - As featured in The Independent.

    "I don't believe a word of Pietersen's book, but then I don't believe a word anyone else has said either."
    - Simon Barnes renders further comment on KP's autobiography superfluous in a sentence

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    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend Uppercut's Avatar
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    Haha, or "as popular as a fart in a spacesuit".

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    Global Moderator nightprowler10's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby View Post
    -If I fell in a bucket of tits I'd come out sucking my thumb (I'm unlucky)
    Haha, like that one.
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    International Coach PhoenixFire's Avatar
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    'I'm sweating like a blind lesbian in a fishmongers.'

    'Couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery.'
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    Hall of Fame Member Johnners's Avatar
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    International Coach G.I.Joe's Avatar
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    confused as a kid at a porn store

    Although given the incidences of 13 year old alleged fathers, I don't think thats quite appicable nowadays.

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    'as welcome as a pork chop in a synagogue'

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    Soutie Langeveldt's Avatar
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    He was sweating like a paedophile in a nursery

    It's not what you know, it's who you blow
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    cpr
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    A favourite of mine that i've never quite understood, usually used at Emile Heskey

    'Couldnt hit a cows arse with a banjo'


    Seriously, where did that one come from?
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    Soutie Langeveldt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cpr View Post
    A favourite of mine that i've never quite understood, usually used at Emile Heskey

    'Couldnt hit a cows arse with a banjo'


    Seriously, where did that one come from?
    Sounds like England..

    I heard he couldn't hit a barn door with a banjo

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    RTDAS pasag's Avatar
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    International Coach G.I.Joe's Avatar
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    "cheese eating surrender monkeys"

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    You'll Never Walk Alone Nate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cpr View Post
    A favourite of mine that i've never quite understood, usually used at Emile Heskey

    'Couldnt hit a cows arse with a banjo'


    Seriously, where did that one come from?
    Remember something similiar being used to describe Henman.

    Pretty sure "He couldn't hit a cow's backside with a banjo, this fella" or something is in the ICC Computer game. (Y)
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    Soutie Langeveldt's Avatar
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    It's in the air



    And safe, and out

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