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Thread: The Lame Joke Corner

  1. #1111
    International Coach PhoenixFire's Avatar
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    Only one laugh? Thought it was worth at least 3 by your standards
    Quote Originally Posted by Top_Cat View Post
    1) Had double pneumonia as a kid, as did my twin sis. Doctors told my parents to pray that we lived through the night. Dad said **** off, I'm an atheist, you ****s better save my kids, etc. Then prayed anyway.

  2. #1112
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend smalishah84's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhoenixFire View Post
    Only one laugh? Thought it was worth at least 3 by your standards
    nah......it wasn't lame enough for this thread to earn 3 smileys
    And smalishah's avatar is the most classy one by far Jan certainly echoes the sentiments of CW

    Yeah we don't crap in the first world; most of us would actually have no idea what that was emanating from Ajmal's backside. Why isn't it roses and rainbows like what happens here? PEWS's retort to Ganeshran on Daemon's picture depicting Ajmal's excreta

  3. #1113
    International Captain LongHopCassidy's Avatar
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    Warning: Not topical.

    I ordered a drink in Pakistan called the Osama. Only three shots, but it goes straight to your head...
    "The Australian cricket captain is the Prime Minister Australia wishes it had. Steve Waugh is that man, Michael Clarke is not." - Jarrod Kimber

    RIP Fardin Qayyumi and Craig Walsh - true icons of CricketWeb.

  4. #1114
    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    George Best & Alex Higgins have been turning cartwheels in heaven.

    [spoiler]They've heard they're getting a Winehouse[/spoiler]
    Cricket Web's 2013/14 Premier League Tipping Champion

    - As featured in The Independent.

    "The committee discussed the issue of illegal bowling actions, and believed that there are a number of bowlers currently employing suspect actions in international cricket, and that the ICC's reporting and testing procedures are not adequately scrutinising these bowlers."
    - Even the ICC's own official press release thinks things must change


  5. #1115
    International Captain wellAlbidarned's Avatar
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    I, for one, would like to congratulate Winehouse for being 48 hours sober.
    Exit pursuing a beer

  6. #1116
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend smalishah84's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LongHopCassidy View Post
    Warning: Not topical.

    I ordered a drink in Pakistan called the Osama. Only three shots, but it goes straight to your head...

  7. #1117
    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    After the recent riots several fires are reported in the Tottenham area of London.






































    Police suspect Arsene.

  8. #1118
    International Captain Himannv's Avatar
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    Good one Brumby :P
    "I will go down as Darren Sammy, the one who always smiles" - Darren Sammy

  9. #1119
    International Coach flibbertyjibber's Avatar
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    After the recent riots in Tottenham it is thought thousands of scousers will be put off travelling to the Spurs v Everton Premier League match, due to fears all the best stuff has already been stolen.

  10. #1120
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend smalishah84's Avatar
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  11. #1121
    cpr
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    Paddy and Mick were caught trying to loot Argos last night. Police apprehended them waiting at collection point B.
    "All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher." - Ambrose Bierce
    Langeveldt: I of course blame their parents.. and unchecked immigration!
    GingerFurball: He's Austrian, they tend to produce the odd ****ed up individual
    Burgey: Be careful dealing with neighbours whose cars don't have wheels but whose houses do.
    Uppercut: Maybe I just need better strippers

  12. #1122
    International Coach PhoenixFire's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by flibbertyjibber View Post
    After the recent riots in Tottenham it is thought thousands of scousers will be put off travelling to the Spurs v Everton Premier League match, due to fears all the best stuff has already been stolen.

  13. #1123
    cpr
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    Doctor: "Your wife's in hospital".
    Husband: "How is she?"
    Doctor: "I'm afraid she's critical".
    Husband: "Ah, you get used to that"

  14. #1124
    International Coach G.I.Joe's Avatar
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    Why can't you fool an aborted foetus?





























    Because it wasn't born yesterday.
    Quote Originally Posted by Athlai View Post
    If GI 'Best Poster On The Forum' Joe says it then it must be true.
    Athlai doesn't lie. And he doesn't do sarcasm either, so you know it's true!

  15. #1125
    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    I was walking the dog through the cemetery earlier today and I saw a man squatting down behind a gravestone.

    "Morning.", I said.

    "No, just taking a crap", he replied.

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