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Thread: The Lame Joke Corner

  1. #766
    International Captain cover drive man's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby View Post
    My girlfriend has got the dreaded, "Big C".






























    It's ok tho, her arsehole is still nice and tight.
    Everyone wants to change the world, noone wants to change himself.

    -Tolstoy

  2. #767
    International 12th Man blahblahblah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby View Post
    My girlfriend has got the dreaded, "Big C".





























    It's ok tho, her arsehole is still nice and tight.

  3. #768
    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    I was asked to go and see my ex-girlfriend today. One thing lead to another and we ended up having sex.

    The Police weren't too pleased. I was only meant to be identifying her body.
    Cricket Web's 2013/14 Premier League Tipping Champion

    - As featured in The Independent.

    "as much a news event as an actual footballer, a worthy stop-start centre forward, but an all-time hyper-galactico when it comes to doing funny things with cars and hats, a player whose signing proves once again that the Premier League is still undoubtedly the best in the world when it comes to doing things with cars and hats."
    - Barney Ronay on Mario Balotelli

  4. #769
    International Captain cover drive man's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby View Post
    I was asked to go and see my ex-girlfriend today. One thing lead to another and we ended up having sex.

    The Police weren't too pleased. I was only meant to be identifying her body.
    Oh god, it's getting worse


  5. #770
    International Coach G.I.Joe's Avatar
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    I wouldn't have seen that coming in a hundred tries
    Quote Originally Posted by Athlai View Post
    If GI 'Best Poster On The Forum' Joe says it then it must be true.
    Athlai doesn't lie. And he doesn't do sarcasm either, so you know it's true!

  6. #771
    vcs
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    Quote Originally Posted by vcs View Post
    A billy goat got loose in a Hollywood film studio and ate a reel of "Gone with the Wind." Another goat asked him how he liked it. Replied the first: "I thought the book was better."
    Nobody laughed at this. I thought it was really funny.

  7. #772
    International Coach G.I.Joe's Avatar
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    It wasn't dirty

  8. #773
    International Coach Shri's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vcs View Post
    Nobody laughed at this. I thought it was really funny.


    <----------------------

  9. #774
    School Boy/Girl Captain El Nino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby View Post
    I was asked to go and see my ex-girlfriend today. One thing lead to another and we ended up having sex.

    The Police weren't too pleased. I was only meant to be identifying her body.
    !!

  10. #775
    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    My mate reckons he's got six testicles.

    I think that's a load of bollocks.

  11. #776
    Hall of Fame Member Johnners's Avatar
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    A woman walks into her accountant's office and tells him that she
    needs to file her taxes. The accountant says, 'Before we begin, I'll
    need to ask a few questions.'
    He-getst1er name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, 'What is
    your occupation?'
    The woman replies, 'I'm a whore.' .
    The accountant balks and says, 'No, no, no. That will never work. That is much
    too crass. Let's try to rephrase that.'
    The woman, 'OK, I'm a prostitute.'
    'No, that is still too crude. Try again.'
    They both think for a minute, then the woman states, 'I'm a chicken farmer.'
    The accountant asks, 'What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore
    or a prostitute?'
    'Well, I raised over 5,000 cocks last year.'
    Quote Originally Posted by Jono View Post
    Mitch Johnson is ****ing awesome for cricket.
    Quote Originally Posted by pasag View Post
    Ponting's ability to ton up in the first innings of a series should not be understated. So much pressure, so important. What a great!

  12. #777
    cpr
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    Lad next to me had to talk a certain British pornstar through her tax return.... Apparently she's a singer/model, according to her job description. Lets just say googling her and clicking her website was definately NSFW.
    "All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher." - Ambrose Bierce
    Langeveldt: I of course blame their parents.. and unchecked immigration!
    GingerFurball: He's Austrian, they tend to produce the odd ****ed up individual
    Burgey: Be careful dealing with neighbours whose cars don't have wheels but whose houses do.
    Uppercut: Maybe I just need better strippers

  13. #778
    U19 Cricketer Themer's Avatar
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    As a young boy I was concerned with the Earth, how we was damaging it with pollution. I was worried for the welfare for all the endangered species, how we were eradicating whole species with every skyscraper we built or every gas-guzzling car was made. I feared for poor, underprivileged children in far away countries that didn't have clean water and were dying of horrible diseases.

    Then I discovered wanking.

  14. #779
    International Captain LongHopCassidy's Avatar
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    Way to worsen the problem with nocturnal emissions.
    "The Australian cricket captain is the Prime Minister Australia wishes it had. Steve Waugh is that man, Michael Clarke is not." - Jarrod Kimber

    RIP Fardin Qayyumi and Craig Walsh - true icons of CricketWeb.

  15. #780
    Hall of Fame Member _Ed_'s Avatar
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    What do you call something that isn't related to elephants?
    Irrelephant.




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