"I am very happy and it will allow me to have lot more rice."
Eoin Morgan on being given a rice cooker for being Man of the Match in a Dhaka Premier Division game.
Following Britain's No.1 diver's brave announcement that he is gay, Manchester United have pledged to fully support Ashley Young during this difficult time.
Cricket Web's 2013/14 Premier League Tipping Champion
- As featured in The Independent.
"as much a news event as an actual footballer, a worthy stop-start centre forward, but an all-time hyper-galactico when it comes to doing funny things with cars and hats, a player whose signing proves once again that the Premier League is still undoubtedly the best in the world when it comes to doing things with cars and hats."
- Barney Ronay on Mario Balotelli
There’s two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says
‘You man the guns, I’ll drive’
How many surrealists do you need to change a light bulb?
Q: What's brown and sticky?
A: A stick.
(Apologies if this has been posted before...)
Guy to his friend
Guy: Do you have any holes in your underwear?
Guy: Are you sure you don't have any holes in your underwear?
Friend: Yes, I am sure
Guy: Then how do you get your legs through
And smalishah's avatar is the most classy one by far Jan certainly echoes the sentiments of CW
Yeah we don't crap in the first world; most of us would actually have no idea what that was emanating from Ajmal's backside. Why isn't it roses and rainbows like what happens here? PEWS's retort to Ganeshran on Daemon's picture depicting Ajmal's excreta
What did the Dublin food cop say to the perp?
Irish-Stew in the name of the law!
What's red and has seven small dents in it?
Snow White's hymen.
I've just paid for my wife and her mother to have two weeks in Paris.
That's how much I hate the ****ing French.
What's the difference between a chickpea & a lentil?
I don't have to pay a hundred quid to have a lentil on my face.
What's the difference between Madonna and a kitkat?
You only get 4 fingers in a kitkat
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