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Old 27-04-2006, 09:41 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Give Yourself A Pat On The Back

I'm sure all of you out there every now and then want to brag about something you've done. Sometimes you feel you don't get enough recognition for things you have done. This is the place to boast and not be ashamed of it. Talk yourself up as much as you want, because that is what is expected in here.

Here is an excerpt from a mate's Myspace detailing my own life-saving abilites last Saturday night:

On the way back from Subway, we took the paved and extremely slanted hill on the carpark as an opportunity to do something stupid.

Basically, Lewis was in a shopping trolley and we thought it would be funny to push him down to Slava and for Slava to stop the trolley before it rolled off the next hill (there was a slope then an even slopier slope).

So Lewis is like "Oh crap" and Andrew's like "Are you ready?" and gives him a bloody hard push off the already steep slope, a few metres down he passes Sandy, who tries to stop it but couldn't because it was too fast, but only causes to make the trolley spin heaps. Then it passes Slava and went off the second slope at which point we were all laughing and yelling at the same time, and Lewis was going fast down the second really inclined slope spinning like hell. We're all screaming and see Burkey near the end of the hill just before a bunch of trees and drop off after that. We're all shouting "Burkey catch him!". Luckily enough Burke sees and grabs the trolley handle, otherwise Lewis could have seriously injured himself or died. The velocity of the trolley combined with Burkey as a pivotal point makes the trolley swing around wildly, before it slows down and Burkey saves the bloody day

Needless to say we all ****ed ourselves laughing.


Now, brag away CW posters!
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Old 27-04-2006, 09:52 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I once beat buddhmaster in an arm wrestle
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The members of this site surely realise that they pretty much copy everything m00pheh does or says? Nearly every acronym used on this site was invented in msn group convos 5 years ago. Anyone remember DAC?

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Old 27-04-2006, 10:19 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I once pushed my friend down a hill in a custom made trolly with wheels, he was heading straight for a new golf, luckily i managed to push him into a nearby dumpster instead
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Old 27-04-2006, 11:59 AM   #4 (permalink)
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I once beat buddhmaster in an arm wrestle
Cmon now Murphy, who's gonna believe that
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Old 27-04-2006, 12:01 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Cmon now Murphy, who's gonna believe that
I should've gone with something more believable.... like i single handedly built the great pyramid.
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Old 27-04-2006, 12:13 PM   #6 (permalink)
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One for the Kiwis:
I rescued a sheep many years ago that was stuck in mud in the river Trent. It had basically given up and was exhausted - its fleece was saturated with water. It took me about 10 minutes to drag it out of the mud and get it up the bank - damned thing then shook itself like a dog and covered me head to foot in lanolin. Took me about 10 baths over the weekend to get rid of the smell.

One for boring people:
In 1963, I dived into a swimming pool fully clothed and saved a small child from drowning. No-one saw me and I didn't tell anyone - this is the first time I've mentioned it in 43 years (and probably the first time I've thought about it in 42).
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Old 27-04-2006, 01:43 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Just over 6 years ago I foiled an armed robbery. I was doing the graveyard shift at a local service station to make ends meet & some wido came in holding a handgun with a woman's stocking over his face. I basically refused to hand over the money & said if he didn't eff off he'd get the pick-axe handle I kept under the counter wrapped round his mush.

When I gave my statement to the police a copper said "But you don't really have a pick-axe handle, do you?", when I replied in the affirmative he again said "No, you don't have a pick axe handle, do you?" & I took his meaning, offensive weapon & all.

Here's the report from our local rag that I've kept
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Old 27-04-2006, 01:52 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by BoyBrumby
Just over 6 years ago I foiled an armed robbery. I was doing the graveyard shift at a local service station to make ends meet & some wido came in holding a handgun with a woman's stocking over his face. I basically refused to hand over the money & said if he didn't eff off he'd get the pick-axe handle I kept under the counter wrapped round his mush.

When I gave my statement to the police a copper said "But you don't really have a pick-axe handle, do you?", when I replied in the affirmative he again said "No, you don't have a pick axe handle, do you?" & I took his meaning, offensive weapon & all.

Here's the report from our local rag that I've kept
Wow. Good effort Dale. In fact, good effort Burkey and Eddie too.

I've never done anything remotely heroic - mildly interesting is about as good as it gets with me.
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Old 27-04-2006, 01:53 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I have a new hero
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Old 27-04-2006, 01:56 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I have a new hero
I'm flattered.
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Old 27-04-2006, 02:06 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BoyBrumby
Just over 6 years ago I foiled an armed robbery. I was doing the graveyard shift at a local service station to make ends meet & some wido came in holding a handgun with a woman's stocking over his face. I basically refused to hand over the money & said if he didn't eff off he'd get the pick-axe handle I kept under the counter wrapped round his mush.

When I gave my statement to the police a copper said "But you don't really have a pick-axe handle, do you?", when I replied in the affirmative he again said "No, you don't have a pick axe handle, do you?" & I took his meaning, offensive weapon & all.

Here's the report from our local rag that I've kept
You're vulnerable?

Good job, bet that fifty quid went down the chute pretty quick.
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Old 27-04-2006, 02:53 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Only awarding you £50 seems a bit tight...

Well done to everyong in this thread. Like BR, I have never done anything heroic.
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Old 27-04-2006, 03:05 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Good on ya Dale
now to me -Last year i got Dux (for those of you playing at home it means top of the class)
and heres the trophy
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RIP Fardin Qayummi - 15th April 2006
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Old 27-04-2006, 03:21 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Here is something non-sporting Im proud of, though not nearly as important as some mentioned above.

Im not a big fan of rules and regulations and like to do things my own way.

Anyway, for my Masters dissertation I had to do 1 year of research and be in constant communication with my tutor/advisor on areas such as topic, structure and content with constant revision, changes and re-writes.

He was supposed to work with us in order to create a dissertation fit for submission and of the required quality.

Anyway, I did not contact him until the day to hand it in.

I went to his office and plonked a 180-190 page document on his desk. He refused to accept it as there was no way that it could be of the required standard and that it could not be structured in an acceptable format. He proceeded to lecture me that I had wasted the opportunity to get a post-grad degree.

I told him that the only rule for submission was that it was bound as a hard back to the defined rules of Masters dissertations and that he had no choice but to accept it. He was not happy, but hey

Results came back. Got very high grades for it and got my Masters. Didnt bother going to the graduation though. Got the cert through the post.

Did it all on my own without help from the system.

Sorry if this was boring but I love proving people wrong
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Old 27-04-2006, 03:26 PM   #15 (permalink)
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well it was boring (mine probably was too)
but still thats always good to prove someone wrong
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