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Thread: Weird news stories

  1. #46
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend Matteh's Avatar
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    Personally i'm interested in what sort of grades he got...
    Quote Originally Posted by cpr View Post
    3. Although Cow Tipping is a hilarious student game in backwater towns such as Bangor, there really is no need for Mitchell to cover one side of the cow in superglue

  2. #47
    International Vice-Captain Anna's Avatar
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    COME ON YOU BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    "One day lad, all this will be yours"
    "What, the curtains?"

  3. #48
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend Matteh's Avatar
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    Haha, looks like a local news programme's joke story for the week.

  4. #49
    International Regular shortpitched713's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Anna View Post
    Needs to mate with another four legged duck for mine.
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    Fraz highlights the defining aspect of Shoaib's legacy:
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    Those humanitarian works etc ?
    Quote Originally Posted by andruid View Post
    I feel Tendulkar's association with the money minting exploitation of cricket fandom by certain varying commercial interests tarnishes his greatness a tad.


  5. #50
    Hall of Fame Member Smudge's Avatar
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    DILDO
    FORMER NZ JOCKEY ADMITS HE TRIED TO "CHEAT THE SYSTEM"
    By Glenn Davis
    Brisbane, March 1 AAP - A former New Zealand jockey caught using a sex aid to deceive stewards in a drug test has admitted a moment of panic led to his indiscretion.
    Jason Warrington was one of 19 track riders and jockeys nabbed in a drug raid at Toowoomba's Clifford Park racecourse in Queensland on Tuesday.
    Warrington had left the track when he was asked by Queensland Racing stewards to come back to provide a urine sample for precautionary drug testing.
    Acting chief steward John Hackett became suspicious of Warrington's actions while he attempted to give a urine sample and caught him squeezing urine from a dildo concealed inside his pants.
    Warrington confessed he had panicked when asked to provide a urine sample as he had smoked marijuana at a weekend party.
    "I tried to cheat the system and I got caught," Warrington told Radio TAB today.
    "It was one of those stupid things you do. I've had some bad luck recently. My wife and I have just split up and she's taken the kids.
    "I went to a party in Toowoomba on Saturday night and had a puff on a marijuana cigarette. When it came to the testing I just panicked."
    Warrington admitted his mistake was unprofessional and it was the first time in his 16-year riding career he had been in trouble with stewards over a drug test.
    "To have a puff on a marijuana cigarette was a stupid thing to do," he said.
    "My wife and I are against it (drugs) as we're church people and it's brought shame to my family."
    Warrington said after he returned home following trackwork he got a call from a steward asking him to return to the course to provide a urine sample.
    "I managed to get hold of a device that would hold urine and got some urine from someone I knew wouldn't be positive," he said.
    "I've had at least 50 tests in my life but the stewards made me drop my pants down to my ankles.
    "It's embarrassing enough to give a sample in front of stewards but to drop your strides was more embarrassing."
    Warrington has been stood down from riding pending further investigations by stewards into the matter.

  6. #51
    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Voltman View Post
    DILDO
    FORMER NZ JOCKEY ADMITS HE TRIED TO "CHEAT THE SYSTEM"
    By Glenn Davis
    Brisbane, March 1 AAP - A former New Zealand jockey caught using a sex aid to deceive stewards in a drug test has admitted a moment of panic led to his indiscretion.
    Jason Warrington was one of 19 track riders and jockeys nabbed in a drug raid at Toowoomba's Clifford Park racecourse in Queensland on Tuesday.
    Warrington had left the track when he was asked by Queensland Racing stewards to come back to provide a urine sample for precautionary drug testing.
    Acting chief steward John Hackett became suspicious of Warrington's actions while he attempted to give a urine sample and caught him squeezing urine from a dildo concealed inside his pants.
    Warrington confessed he had panicked when asked to provide a urine sample as he had smoked marijuana at a weekend party.
    "I tried to cheat the system and I got caught," Warrington told Radio TAB today.
    "It was one of those stupid things you do. I've had some bad luck recently. My wife and I have just split up and she's taken the kids.
    "I went to a party in Toowoomba on Saturday night and had a puff on a marijuana cigarette. When it came to the testing I just panicked."
    Warrington admitted his mistake was unprofessional and it was the first time in his 16-year riding career he had been in trouble with stewards over a drug test.
    "To have a puff on a marijuana cigarette was a stupid thing to do," he said.
    "My wife and I are against it (drugs) as we're church people and it's brought shame to my family."
    Warrington said after he returned home following trackwork he got a call from a steward asking him to return to the course to provide a urine sample.
    "I managed to get hold of a device that would hold urine and got some urine from someone I knew wouldn't be positive," he said.
    "I've had at least 50 tests in my life but the stewards made me drop my pants down to my ankles.
    "It's embarrassing enough to give a sample in front of stewards but to drop your strides was more embarrassing."
    Warrington has been stood down from riding pending further investigations by stewards into the matter.
    Maradona beat him to it.
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  7. #52
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend andyc's Avatar
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    Child kills giant pig



    That's one ****ing big pig.
    Quote Originally Posted by flibbertyjibber View Post
    Only a bunch of convicts having been beaten 3-0 and gone 9 tests without a win and won just 1 in 11 against England could go into the home series saying they will win. England will win in Australia again this winter as they are a better side which they have shown this summer. 3-0 doesn't lie girls.

  8. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by andyc View Post
    Child kills giant pig



    That's one ****ing big pig.
    Holy ****! What a monster.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Richard View Post
    Romance can be dealt with elsewhere - I just don't enjoy it in cricket.

  9. #54
    RTDAS pasag's Avatar
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    Just a really small kid for mine.
    Rest In Peace Craigos
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  10. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby View Post
    Police said "It's quite an unusual theft but I suppose it is valuable because of its former owner. We're confident we can sniff it out".


  11. #56
    World Traveller Craig's Avatar
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    This

    I bet somebodies day got a whole lot better
    Beware the lollipop of mediocrity. Lick once and you suck forever...

    RIP Fardin Qayyumi, a true legend of CW

    Quote Originally Posted by Boobidy View Post
    Bradman never had to face quicks like Sharma and Irfan Pathan. He wouldn't of lasted a ball against those 2, not to mention a spinner like Sehwag.

  12. #57
    International Captain nibbs's Avatar
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    severe burns to the anus, lol
    "Matt Damon"

  13. #58
    World Traveller Craig's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nibbs View Post
    severe burns to the anus, lol
    That needed a after it tbh.

  14. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by Craig View Post
    That needed a after it tbh.
    Tell us about your burnt anus experience Craig?

  15. #60
    World Traveller Craig's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fiery View Post
    Tell us about your burnt anus experience Craig?
    Can't remember anything like that happening...

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