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Thread: Monty Python

  1. #1
    International Vice-Captain Anna's Avatar
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    Monty Python

    Monty Python & The Holy Grail:
    " I blow my nose at you, so called Arthur King, you and all your silly English kaniggets"

    BROTHER: "And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out
    the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three, no more, no less.
    Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the
    counting shalt be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either
    count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is
    right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be
    reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards
    thou foe, who being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.'"

    Oh the greatness

    http://www.rit.edu/~smo4215/monty.htm#Scene%208

    COME ON YOU BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    "One day lad, all this will be yours"
    "What, the curtains?"

  2. #2
    Spanish_Vicente sledger's Avatar
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    great indeed well done mr cleese and co, an all time comedy classic.

  3. #3
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend Samuel_Vimes's Avatar
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    Mater tua criceta fuit, et pater tuo redoluit bacarum sambucus.
    Messi scores on the rebound.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Adolf Grünbaum
    Is the conduct approved by the gods right ("pious"), because of properties of its own, or merely because it pleases the gods to value or command it?

  4. #4
    Cricket Web XI Moderator lord_of_darkness's Avatar
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    Monty Python is a classic !
    Don L-o-d , Legion Of Doom

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    Co Chairman CWBCC - Cricketweb XI - CW Green | Manager of Hampshire CC - Wccc | Chairman of the Muralitharan Supporters Club ~MSC~ |

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  5. #5
    Spanish_Vicente sledger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lord_of_darkness
    Monty Python is a classic !
    agreed, ooh my thats brought up my 500, what a coincidence

  6. #6
    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    I'm a big fan of the "Bruces" sketch where an Englisman goes to teach in an Australian uni where, obviously, everyone is called Bruce.

    Monty Python's Australian national anthem:

    Australia, Australia, Australia, Australia, we love you. Amen!

    The rules of the philosophy faculty:

    Rule one - no pooftahs. Rule two, no member of the faculty is to maltreat the Abbos in any way whatsoever - if there's anybody watching. Rule three - no pooftahs. Rule four - I don't want to catch anyone not drinking in their room after lights out. Rule five - no pooftahs. Rule six - there is no rule six! Rule seven - no pooftahs. That concludes the reading of the rules, Bruce.

    Click here for the full sketch:

    http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode22.htm
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    - Barney Ronay on Mario Balotelli

  7. #7
    Hall of Fame Member FaaipDeOiad's Avatar
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    "This here's the wattle - the emblem of our land. You can stick it in a bottle or you can hold it in your hand."

    Hahahaha.
    I know a place where a royal flush
    Can never beat a pair

  8. #8
    Soutie Langeveldt's Avatar
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    Sorry to be the total killjoy, but I've never found MP even remotely amusing.. Just made me cringe through the whole lot of it.. Although I have been to where Life of Bryan was filmed, that was cool..

    Okay, I'll leave before I am chucked out
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    Thanks Dick Smith. Will remember to subscribe to your newsletter for more electronic fun facts.

    ****.

  9. #9
    International Vice-Captain Anna's Avatar
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    Just thought I'd bring this up again as Dylan expressed an interest

    Read the sig

  10. #10
    International Coach Barney Rubble's Avatar
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    He's not the Messiah, he's a very naughty boy!

    It had to be said.

    Also:

    Brian: I'm not the Messiah! Now **** off!
    Worshipper: (pauses).....How shall we **** off, O Lord?


    Genius.

  11. #11
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend andyc's Avatar
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    Ahh... Monty Python...
    Quote Originally Posted by flibbertyjibber View Post
    Only a bunch of convicts having been beaten 3-0 and gone 9 tests without a win and won just 1 in 11 against England could go into the home series saying they will win. England will win in Australia again this winter as they are a better side which they have shown this summer. 3-0 doesn't lie girls.

  12. #12
    International Vice-Captain Anna's Avatar
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    Minister: Good morning. I'm sorry to have kept you waiting, but I'm afraid my walk has become rather sillier recently, and so it takes me rather longer to get to work. (sits at desk) Now then, what was it again?

    Mr Pudey: Well sir, I have a silly walk and I'd like to obtain a Government grant to help me develop it.

    Minister: I see. May I see your silly walk?

    Mr Pudey: Yes, certainly, yes.

    (He gets up and does a few steps, lifting the bottom part of his left leg sharply at every alternate pace. He stops.)

    Minister: That's it, is it?

    Mr Pudey: Yes, that's it, yes.

    Minister: lt's not particularly silly, is it? I mean, the right leg isn't silly at all and the left leg merely does a forward aerial half turn every alternate step.

    Mr Pudey: Yes, but I think that with Government backing I could make it very silly.

    Monty Python Sketches

  13. #13
    Hall of Fame Member _Ed_'s Avatar
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    Expedition Leader: We're going to climb the two peaks of Mt Kilimanjaro
    Climber: But...there's only one peak, sir.
    (Expedition Leader covers one eye and looks at map)
    Expedition Leader: So there is. Anyway, we're going to see if we can find any trace of last year's expedition.
    Climber: Last year's expedition?
    Expedition Leader: Yes, it was led by my brother. They were going to build a bridge between the two peaks...(covers one eye and looks at map again).

  14. #14
    International Debutant DJellett's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Voltman View Post
    Melicous? Is that a nasty, yet tasty, comment?

  15. #15
    Hall of Fame Member luckyeddie's Avatar
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    Some may be a bit wrong because I will NEVER copy and paste Python.... See if you can guess the sketch (or bit of film) each quote is from (difficulty - no Google)


    My hovercraft is full of eels.

    A shrubbery!

    That's just the kind of blinkered Philistine pig-ignorance we come to expect from you non-creative garbage.....

    Crunchy Frog

    I've got a hat - with "Lion Tamer" written across it in big letters that light up so you can tame them in the dark when they're less stroppy...

    Everest - forbidding, aloof, terrifying - the mountain with the biggest t-ts in the world.

    YETANOTHER Pratt, Not out but dreadfully hurt 139

    Well speaking personally, I'd annex the Sudetenland..

    Right. On with the pixie hats and order in the skating vicar...

    All brontosauruses are thin at one end, much, much thicker in the middle and then thin again at the other end....

    Well, there's not much call for it round here, sir...

    Caribou..... GOOOOORRRNNNN !!!

    Oh, yes.. Khaki, kind, kettle, Kipling, Kuwait, Kings Bollege Bambridge (or Keeble Bollege Oxford)

    Blimey! This redistribution of wealth is more difficult than I thought...

    DOCTOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BRANE HURTS!!!!!!!

    TIE HER...... (oh dear!) TO THE RACK!!!

    Where are we gouing to get 44 tons of plankton every morning?

    Did I call you 'Eddie Baby'?

    I'm going to dig a pit for Scott and put a box in Vanilla's trench...

    You've got a pet halibut?

    Wainscotting!!

    A little fermented curd will do the trick.

    Yes, the mollusc is a randy little fellow whose primitive brain scarcely strays from the subject of you-know-what...

    This year, our members have put more things on top of other things than ever before...

    Bally Jerry pranged his kite right in the how's-your-father... Hairy blighter dickie-birdied...

    CLINK! BEND! SCREW! INFLATE! ALTER SADDLE!
    Nigel Clough's Black and White Army, beating Forest away with 10 men

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