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Thread: Corporate lessons - Quite Original

  1. #1
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend Mister Wright's Avatar
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    Corporate lessons - Quite Original

    >Corporate Lesson 1:
    >A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her
    >shower, when the doorbell rings.
    >The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she
    >opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbour. Before she says
    >a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that towel,"
    >
    >After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked
    >in
    >front of Bob.
    >After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves.
    >The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.
    >When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?"
    >"It was Bob the next door neighbour," she replies.
    >"Great!" the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he owes
    me?"
    >
    >Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to
    >credit
    >and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to
    >prevent avoidable exposure.
    >
    >
    >
    >Corporate Lesson 2:
    >A priest offered a lift to a Nun.
    >She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The
    >priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily
    >slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
    >The priest removed his hand.
    >But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.
    >The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
    >The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
    >Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.
    >On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129.
    >It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."
    >
    >Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might
    >miss a great opportunity.
    >
    >
    >
    >Corporate Lesson 3:
    >A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to
    >lunch
    >when they find an antique oil lamp.
    >They rub it and a Genie comes out.
    >The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish."
    >"Me first! Me first!" says the admin. clerk.
    >"I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the
    >world." Poof! She's gone.
    >"Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing
    >on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas
    >and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone.
    >
    >"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.
    >The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."
    >
    >Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
    >
    >
    >
    >Corporate Lesson 4:
    >A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
    >A rabbit asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day
    >long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the
    >ground below the crow, and rested. A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate
    >it.
    >
    >Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be
    >sitting
    >very high up.
    >
    >
    >
    >Corporate Lesson 5:
    >A turkey was chatting with a bull.
    >"I would love to be able to Get to the top of that tree," sighed the
    >turkey, but I haven't got the energy."
    >"Well, why don't you nibble on my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're
    >packed with nutrients."
    >The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough
    >strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.
    >The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
    >Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of
    >the tree.
    >Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
    >
    >Moral of the story: Bullshėt might get you to the top, but it won't
    >keep
    >you there.
    Cricketweb Colts Captain



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  2. #2
    U19 12th Man
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    I have heard 2 and 4 already, but a good lesson I would say

  3. #3
    International Captain Buddhmaster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mister Wright
    >Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be
    >sitting
    >very high up.
    Lmao. Those were very good, great post. But I could be the only one that hasn't heard them.

  4. #4
    International Debutant Waughney's Avatar
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    lol
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  5. #5
    Hall of Fame Member age_master's Avatar
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    great stuff
    Member of CW Green
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  6. #6
    Cricketer Of The Year Mr Casson's Avatar
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    Finally, something that is original!!! Good work Kyle!
    'Copperfield,' said Mr. Micawber, 'farewell! Every happiness and prosperity! If, in the progress of revolving years, I could persuade myself that my blighted destiny had been a warning to you, I should feel that I had not occupied another man's place in existence altogether in vain.
    - Wilkins Micawber

  7. #7
    Virat Kohli (c) Jono's Avatar
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    LOL! Those were awesome.

    Great stuff.
    "I am very happy and it will allow me to have lot more rice."

    Eoin Morgan on being given a rice cooker for being Man of the Match in a Dhaka Premier Division game.

  8. #8
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend andyc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Casson
    Finally, something that is original!!! Good work Kyle!
    unlike those blatantly plagiarised guides of yours, casson.
    hey by the way, what's with the sig?

  9. #9
    Cricketer Of The Year Mr Casson's Avatar
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    I'm banking on someone else explaining it...

  10. #10
    Request Your Custom Title Now! benchmark00's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by andyc
    unlike those blatantly plagiarised guides of yours, casson.
    hey by the way, what's with the sig?
    Don't question it, just agree!
    Parmi | #1 draft pick | Jake King is **** | Big Bash League tipping champion of the universe
    Come and Paint Turtle
    Quote Originally Posted by Jono View Post
    Kohli. Do something in test cricket for once please.

    Thanks.



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