steds' story: yet another tour diary?!?! Aren't there enough?!?!
So, here I am. It's the end of season 7 and I need to get away. Not that I don't like you or ought, it's just I need a change to refresh me for season 8. AM Zebra's 5Day average in season 7 was in the 50's, so I have a window of oppertunity. An chance to make the Reds #1 5Day spinners spot my own.
<Cue Rocky theme tune>But I must be fitter, more accurate and more consistent. Therefore I'm going to play professional cricket in the off season.
I have several choices:
England- Nah, too cold
Australia- Well, I heard Western Australia were looking for a spinner, so I applied. This was the Responce(or something like):
That leaves USA or Trinidad and Tobago. I shall decide through a series of head to heads.
Is this a f***ing joke?!?!?! You're a Pom!!!!!!!!!!! F*** OFF!!!!!!!!
Standard of Cricket: T&T
Sun and Beaches: T&T(hopefully no hurricanes)
Scantilly clad women:T&T(you seen those Carib beer girls? ;) )
Availability of Cannabis: T&T
Least George W Bushes: T&T
We have a winner!!! I'm off to T&T, hopefully
Match 2: Gunning for the porters
Our second match was "the battle of the cities" between San Fernando Thunderbirds and the Port of Spain Porters. It was another road trip for us, and thanks to Rondell Lochans extremely bad driving, our two stars Xavier Marshall and Dave Mohammed were traumatised. According to Liam, the journey should take about an hour, but thanks to kamikaze Lochan, us four made it in 35 minutes. However, we might as well have walked as the two prides of the West Indies were vomiting into a toilet until the toss.
It was decided that we couldn't play without them, but they both had to field on the boundary, accompanied by buckets. Port of Spain won the toss and batted on a very poor wicket, hoping that our spin trio wouldn't get to bowl on the last day. We started well, batsman Timothy Ramnarine catching Gareth King for a duck off Harvard's (the Canadian) bowling. However, things quickly turned sour. The third wicket yielding 96 runs, 32 of them off 5 overs of me!!!!!!! :( . But when Simmons played on to Liam, a flurry of wickets came-4 wickets going down for 39 runs. I cleaned up numbers 10 and 11 to make my figures look slightly better, finishing with 9.1-1-50-2. Please ignore the economy rate ;) . We had managed to bowl them out for 219 in the first day, not bad...
...Or so we thought before they bowled. We were all out for 192. PR Sajith(Biased Indian) tore through our middle order like a shark through a surfboard, removing numbers 2,4,5,6,7, and 9 to claim 6/27. I predict that him and Hoy will lead the CW XI attack by season 10. He'd obviously done his homework, bowling to everyones weakness. Liam got a bouncer, whilst everything for me was pitched up outside off stump before I edged to first slip. Only captain Campos resisted in any way, bludgeoning 58 before falling to Sajith, too. (Bloody Indians!! Why they got to be so bloody good?!?!)
We had to take a lot off cheap wickets, and we started well enough, me and Dave dismissing the openers cheaply to reduce them to 49/2. From then on, it was downhill as they compiled 350/9 before declaring. Being declared upon is so demeaning :( .
We were really never going to get 378 in less than a day but, being Aussies, Campos and Kearsley weren't going to die wondering. They took the attack to the Porters, their bats scything through almost every ball. Seeing them in partnership would have been interesting, but Campos(who scord 77 off 78) was undone by a slower ball from Tam to bring Kearsley in, who promptly smashed 64 off 55 to keep the crowd, knowing the match was heading for another draw, entertained.
In summary, we got our ar$es kicked. My match figures of 34.1-4-137-4 weren't particularly flattering. Well, back to the nets with Dave.