*Official* CW in Australia Tour Diary

[Neil Pickup]

Well, the fourteen has been announced. And it appears the selectors completely forgot about the fact that Australian pitches tend to be bouncy. And picked two fast bowlers and two medium pacers. If I was Matthew Hayden I would quite possibly be making a great big mess out of my underpants at the thought of feasting upon Liam and Sangrah's bowling.

And Guy has been picked ahead of Corey. Well, you can imagine the aftermath of that. Let's just say it resulted in another trip back to Brisbane Royal an several long, drawn out operations regarding the removal of cricket stumps from sensitive areas.

The tour finished this week after several days' intense net practice. Anthony McGrath spent so long teaching me to play the short ball - I can now effortlessly deflect it to any one of gully, second or third slip without looking at it. Ajit has given Liam hands-on knowledge of how to neutralise the Aussie pace attack (well, the best directions to and from the pavilions) and Andy Flower imparted his knowledge on how to keep wicket and bat to Pete, Megan and Andre (as well as how to get dodgy citizenship qualiifcations), whilst Curtly Ambrose and Mark Waugh both excelled in passing on their specialist knowledge gained from decades of top level competition. Unfortunately, they were sent to the wrong ends of the nets, so that really didn't help anyone.

Tomorrow, we have a 5-way Beach Cricket Tournament followed by a Karaoke evening. Let's hope it all stays peaceful. Yeah, right.

[Neil Pickup]

Must apologise for lateness. Have been busing working/watching football/abusing short Welsh people.

Ahh, 'tas been an eventful week. The Beach Cricket Championship managed to pass without any arrests (and not just because I'm too lazy to write them in..) Had its fair share of intrigue however, and Blewy's man-of-the-tournament display did more than a little to ensure his place in the 14. The tournament was won by the Neil Pickup XI (I didn't cheat!) thanks to two centuries from Blewy. Eyes_Only and Marc71178 were the other players to reach three figures.

However the real interest came off the pitch as a bit of old rivalry resurfaced - and I think it might have had more than a little bit do with the squad selections... A certain leg spinning allrounder was, well, let's say, fraternising with a fairly attractive local member of the opposite sex - fairly successfully as well, it should be said - when a certain off spinning all rounder made very short shrift of the burgeoning relationship.

Legal speak over, net result was Reuben scoring and Rich in floods of tears. We were lucky that we actually managed to finish the tournament as the tide was coming in as well, the rate things were coming from both directions we could well have been calling for the armbands before too long (cue Blewy's aerial routes)...

Rich wouldn't come out of his damn room for the evening karaoke, well he missed out, that's all I can say.

More to come on that, when I sort out the tapes, and the warm-up games later...

[Langeveldt]

Dang!

[Blewy]

What a great thrill the Beach Cricket tourny was, Happy with my form and pleased that i could help get Neils XI over the line...

Hopefully the selectors take my form on notice and i get a start in the test series...

[lord_of_darkness]

Dang!

i was drunk she was drunk.. you know.. maybe she likes offies?

[Langeveldt]

Originally posted by lord_of_darkness
i was drunk she was drunk.. you know.. maybe she likes offies?

Hmm so thats where all those hours of finger spin comes in useful

So is it all a fix? I do all the scoring on the field, and Lord saves all his for off the field?

[marc71178]

Evidentally the Beach Cricket counted for nothing

[Mr Mxyzptlk]

It's a conspiracy Marc.

[Neil Pickup]

Hmm.. still short of inspiration here except for what's been said already in the game thread(s)...

[lord_of_darkness]

have some beer?

[Mr. P]

The tours started neil. Bring back the Diary!:!(

[Neil Pickup]

Some people - who will remain nameless - has been stealing the paper out of my diary because they can't get hold of Rizlas as easy as they would like. As such, I've got nothing to write on, and this is being scribbled on the toilet paper in the Bellerive Oval loos.

I feel that I cannot continue in this atmosphere any longer. Not only are we being subjected to more carcinogens than in a nightclub on the Randstad, but we are at the mercy of selection policies that have left me wishing that someone more reliable, like Tauqir Zia, was in charge.

When players have their selection guaranteed indefinitely, no matter how poorly they perform, and others are dropped after two games in spite of topping averages beforehand, the time has come to act.

After much soul-searching, and in collaboration with Andre Maddocks and Marc Robbins, we will be launching a rebel tour to South Africa - in association with Channel 9 - and those concerned will withdraw from the Australia tour party with immediate effect.

We are not the instigators of this course of action. Our hand has been forced, and I am sure all sides desire an amicable solution. The ball is in your court.

VIVA LA REVOLUTION

*Neil Pickup
Andre
Marc71178
IamDavid
MasterBlaster
Rik
+PY
Don Ricardo
Langeveldt
Kimbo
Gibbsnsmith
Bugssy
Blewy
KRKode

[marc71178]

Go the rebs!!!!

[Blewy]

This is a sad day, however, i know i speak for the majority of the group but we had to take a stance... This will make the CWXI a better place in the future...

[Mr Mxyzptlk]

Moments ago at his hotel in Sydney, Mr Mxyzpltk made this statement regarding the recent invitation to become part of the rebel tour to South Africa:

"In light of recent events, I am pressed to make a decision regarding my future in the CW XI and possibly as a FC cricketer. This has not been easy and much though (20 minutes or thereabout) has gone into it. At last I have come to a decision. I am announcing my withdrawal from the current tour of Australia effective immediately. As such, I will not be available for selection for tomorrow's game and the finals.

Also, I will not be going with the Rebels to South Africa. I feel that this is the ideal opportunity for me to return to my native Trinidad and Tobago and take a well-earned(paid) vacation while letting the board and the rebels nuke each other.

Thank you for your time."