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Thread: comical occurrences in club cricket

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    International Debutant Shady Slim's Avatar
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    comical occurrences in club cricket

    hello cricketweb it is i with another "prying in to your cricket life" thread! now i am asking you to name the funniest things you've seen in club games or school games or whatever

    mine happened to me in the nets when training, a mate of mine bowls slow mediums and i cleared the front leg to clang him out of the net straight over his head, swung with all my power...

    and then the bat careered straight in to the side of my back foot, which had not moved from my stance, on it's way through. full force.

    and then i went straight down like a sack of bricks and truth be told probably would have been stumped if it was a game because keeping my feet grounded wasn't my first priority

    so how about you, CW?

    don't just give us youtube's funniest give us your stories if you can
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    Hall of Fame Member fredfertang's Avatar
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    A few years ago now there was an England cricketer nicknamed 'plank', on account of his being as thick as two short ones.

    My club had a bloke with the same surname. He was cut from a similar cloth as 'plank', but more so, so we called him 'log'

    Log was quite a talented cricketer when he turned his mind to it, and was also a public schoolboy and sounded like one - on one occasion we were playing a village team composed mainly of farm workers, who weren't always well disposed to the gentry

    Anyway a distinctly quick opening bowler castled our skipper with the first delivery of the match and got another two wickets in that first over.

    His opening partner got another one and he started his second over with us something like 2-4 and Log facing his first delivery - he had wandered to the wicket looking, as he often did, like a prize prat - he wore flannels that were probably his grandfather's, those old fashioned gloves with the green spikes and something akin to a Jardinian Harlequin cap on his head

    He then took an inordinate amount of time, as he always did, to take guard, addressing the umpire repeatedly as 'old chap' - you need to bear in mind throughout this story that he was genuinely totally ignorant of the fact that he might be winding up the opposition

    Now ready Log then did his usual and waved at the bowler barking 'I'm ready now bowler, you can play on'

    You might not be surprised to learn that the bowler was spitting feathers by now and unleashed a short one at dear old Log, who deposited it over square leg.

    The next delivery was shorter and faster and flew over fine leg's head.

    The bowler lost his radar with the third one that bounced high and way past the off stump and off for four byes.

    Delivery four was a much better bouncer, and would have taken Log's head off, were it not for the fact Log could bat, which meant it was six more over square leg - it really was an amazing shot - it went past square leg at chest height before the bloke had a chance to move a muscle.

    Now Log was a genuinely helpful sort of bloke and as the fuming bowler turned at the end of his run for the fifth ball of the over he waved at him again, a rather silly prissy wave tbh, and said 'bowler, do you mind if I suggest it might be an idea to try pitching it up a bit'

    Too ****ing right he minded of course - not much of what the bowler said as he marched towards Log would get through the filter and we had a slight delay as the bowler's teammates, at least those few still able to keep a straight face, tried to calm their man down and keep him away from Log. My lot were all wetting ourselves with laughter - Log had of course done similar things before, but never as well as this and I had the very great pleasure of being the umpire at the bowler's end at the time, so had a grandstand view

    Sadly when Log was finally dismissed, for 70 odd, it wasn't the opening bowler who got him. Another of his endearing habits was that whenever he was out he'd go up to the bowler and shake his hand and we were all hoping for another confrontation
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    Request Your Custom Title Now! Howe_zat's Avatar
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    I didn't know you played with Bertie Wooster
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    International Regular Stapel's Avatar
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    Standing in the gully, I have had the pleasure of watcing the most ridiculous catch, from the closest possible position:

    The opponent batsman had edged a ball to where first slip would be. There was a slip, but he was widish. Both keeper and fielder went for it. The keeper got some glove on it, so the ball balooned to the slip fielder's right side, while he was faling to his left side. Sitting on his arse, he managed to kick the ball up in the air, upon which the keeper managed to take it. It was quite amazing!
    Madness. Exhilarating. Magical. Netherlands have crossed the line in an unbelievable 13.5 overs.
    It's like watching a Gayle from each end. And when one Gayle gets out.. Another Gayle comes in...


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    Evil Scotsman Furball's Avatar
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    Outstanding from fertang, wish I'd seen that
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    Opposition collapsed from 89-1 to 105 all out chasing 107 with comedy run outs and a reverse sweep LBW. So good.
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    We once played our neighbours (our boundaries are literally ten yards apart) won the toss and elected to bowl. We skittled them for 12 inside 5 overs with a few byes and wides making extras their top scorer. We reversed our batting order and chased it down in 8 balls.

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    State Captain Chubb's Avatar
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    Seven runs off one ball:

    Batsmen take quick single but the keeper misses the throw and they run an overthrow. The fielder backing up throws terribly wide of the keeper and the batsmen steal another run. The THIRD throw goes straight to the bowler, who is so angry he swears loudly and hurls it down into the ground, very hard, and it rolls off down the hill (my old club's pitch was on a pronounced slope) for four runs.

    Before anyone asks, yes the local paper contacted the Umpirer's and Scorer's Association or some such and they said this was legally 7 runs.

    There was also the time I headed a ball for six trying to take a catch on the boundary (I didn't just knock it over the rope, it went OVER THE FENCE AND INTO THE ROAD) and was lucky not to get a fractured skull.
    Last edited by Chubb; 21-03-2016 at 02:33 PM.
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    Hall of Fame Member Hurricane's Avatar
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    Probably a you had to be there to find it funny kind of a moment but I was watching the juniors finish their match before the men's match took the field.

    Apparently it was a close game. The bowler looked about 12 and had blonde hair. He runs in and skittles the batsman and wins the game.

    His team mates try to congratulate him but they can't catch him because the blonde kid is legging it for the mid wicket boundary. It is the one kid sprinting out in front with 10 others determined to catch him. For some reason the scene captures the imagination of the batting team so they rush on the field and join in the pursuit.

    Last I saw the kid made it to the street and ran off out of the ground with 21 blokes after him with a few concerned parents yelling things.
    Last edited by Hurricane; 21-03-2016 at 10:34 PM.
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    "the IAS XI found themselves in a tight spot as they had to score three runs in two overs. However, they gave it their best and scored only two runs, and managing 126 runs in their quota of 20 overs."

    Sycophancy unlimited: When IAS officers did everything to lose to Akilesh Yadav at cricket | The News Minute

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    U19 Vice-Captain Biryani Pillow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hurricane View Post
    Probably a you had to be there to find it funny kind of a moment but I was watching the juniors finish their match before the men's match took the field.

    Apparently it was a close game. The bowler looked about 12 and had blonde hair. He runs in and skittles the batsman and wins the game.

    His team mates try to congratulate him but they can't catch him because the blonde kid is legging it for the mid wicket boundary. It is the one kid sprinting out in front with 10 others determined to catch him. For some reason the scene captures the imagination of the batting team so they rush on the field and join in the pursuit.

    Last I saw the kid made it to the street and ran off out of the ground with 21 blokes after him with a few concerned parents yelling things.
    Junior (and the more junior the better) cricket can be hilarious.

    Last summer I was doing an U10 Tournament. One delivery, my colleague and I decided, produced 5 runs, all run, with the ball never going more than 20 yards from the stumps. One ball, and several kids, flying everywhere.

    Sooooo....... many but I'll offer 3 from one game a few years back.

    This was for a wandering Sunday team I assisted for a time. It was run by a chap known very affectionately as "Chancer" (a play on his last name). Now Chancer, although looking nothing like him, was very much a Henry Blofeld type of character - very posh and charming but with a sharp, biting and friendly sense of humour.

    If, at that time, you met him during the summer he would, after initial pleasantries, ask the question "Do you play cricket?" Should your answer be negative the likely response would be "We have a game on Sunday, do you fancy a go?". Should your reply be (and this did once happen) "Actually I've played 20+ Tests and several ODIs" you would be offered the same deal.

    On this day the first story involves the opening batsmen, one of whom played decent Club cricket and Oxford University 2nd XI, the other was a very short chap, under 5ft tall. This was at a very famous old ground, but exposed and, even on a gentle day, quite windy. They'd put on about 50 when the latter was bowled. Now normally when someone is bowled you could, knowing the game, make a fair guess as to why - maybe the ball did something or the batsman made a misjudgement. In this case you couldn't - no clues. As I came off at tea the other batsman beckoned me over with a chuckle. The excuse given was "I was just about to play the ball when a big gust of wind came and blew me over!"

    Late in the game, in an attempt to keep the game open, Chancer puts himself on. I suspect he would have been, in a competitive game, a fairly decent leggie. But this is Sunday friendly cricket and he bowls to buy wickets or, as I said, keep the chasing side interested. He bowls from the batting crease, not the popping crease. In his 2nd over he takes a wicket. As he's ambling back I observe "Chancer, you do know you can bowl from that front line?" with a very pained expression he replies "Yes, I know, but it's SUCH a long way!"

    Previously in the innings came the best moment. The scheduled number 3 batsman in his team was a Minor Counties player. Because the openers put on over 50 he slides down the order. The batting continues to be on top so, to ensure lesser players have a game he slides further and further down. I think he finally came in for the last couple of overs at 9 or 10. However. in the field he performs to the standards of his best cricket. Excellent all round work including seriously good pick up and throws, dives, sliding pick up and throws in one movement, the whole show. There comes a point when the ball is struck past Chancer at mid on and he sets off in (a successful) chase. You KNOW he's thinking he has got to try and match the minor county player's work. He attempts the slide, a precursor to a hoped for throw in the same movement. He goes down in stages and performs a manoeuvre that can best be described as looking a bit like a swimmers tumble turn. It is not successful. From the prone position an arm comes up and the ball is propelled slowly towards the stumps. Chancer slowly gets to his feet and shakily heads toward his fielding position. You know that everyone on the field and watching is supressing massive laughter - I certainly was. As he gets back to his post I fell I must enquire after his condition "You OK Chancer?" The reply (in a very posh voice) comes back "Well I'm not ****ing doing THAT again!!!!!!" Those within range of that could no longer supress the laughter.......
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    International Captain Riggins's Avatar
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    Had a team mate go in as night watchman and get stumped third ball for 12.
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    U19 Vice-Captain Biryani Pillow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shady Slim View Post
    hello cricketweb it is i with another "prying in to your cricket life" thread! now i am asking you to name the funniest things you've seen in club games or school games or whatever

    mine happened to me in the nets when training, a mate of mine bowls slow mediums and i cleared the front leg to clang him out of the net straight over his head, swung with all my power...

    and then the bat careered straight in to the side of my back foot, which had not moved from my stance, on it's way through. full force.

    and then i went straight down like a sack of bricks and truth be told probably would have been stumped if it was a game because keeping my feet grounded wasn't my first priority so how about you, CW?

    don't just give us youtube's funniest give us your stories if you can
    If the umpire was of the opinion that a serious injury had occurred he would be justified in calling 'dead ball' and you would not have been stumped.

  14. #14
    Dan
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    I umpired an U/10Fs final the other week, which featured about 3 or 4 of the Bell/Bresnan/Watson dropped catch run-out scenarios.

    Aside from that, the most comical things I've seen would be someone (totally not me ) channelling Bob Willis and forgetting to pick up their bat on the way out, people contriving to get hit in the gents in remarkably creative ways, or people (and this one genuinely isn't me) wicketkeeping in short sleeves.

    Oh, and the time I came off at drinks, got a resounding speech from the team captain (who is also my father) telling me to bat through the innings, followed by him running me out two overs after the break.
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    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend _Ed_'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Riggins View Post
    Had a team mate go in as night watchman and get stumped third ball for 12.
    That's glorious.

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