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Thread: Battle of the Infamous

  1. #811
    International Captain LongHopCassidy's Avatar
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    Semi-final 2

    Mohammad Asif (Pakistan)



    Crimes:

    - Suspended for being a drug cheat (exonerated after a lengthly boo-****ing-hoo), 2006
    - Suspended for being a drug cheat, 2009
    - Third stooge of the spot fixing scandal
    - Drug smuggling in the UAE
    - Attempted extortion of his fiance
    - Hide yo kids, hide yo wife


    "I didn't do anything wrong. There was one no-ball and, whatever the scenario was behind it, I described it in the court. There are lots of things and it will be in my book, which will be launched very soon." - Foreword to Asif: It's Tough Being Me

    "It is hard to see how this could be an isolated occurrence for you." - Justice Cooke hands down his judgment on the above quote

    "I love cricket: it is something that runs through me in my veins and my blood." - Along with THC

    "I seriously expected a bravery award after what I have done." - Asif's ex-girlfriend after testifying on his spot-fixing

    "He is a friendly and nice guy. I was shocked to hear about the allegations, so I dropped him from the film." - Bollywood director about Asif starring in a movie promoting friendship between India and Pakistan

    "It is definite that he committed the crime as he was caught red-handed ... however in certain cases and for a faster litigation process the Public Prosecution drops a case due to insignificance and deports the suspect." - PCB, who else?

    "Mohammad Asif is a superstar of Pakistan and we should not leave him alone over there [Dubai] and should not spare any effort to bring him back. We request the president and the premier to intervene in the matter and bring back the superstar." - Pakistani senator Zafar Iqbal Chaudhary

    Quote Originally Posted by pasag View Post
    Is the implication, that if he wasn't a superstar they should have just let him rot? Would the same calls be made if it was Mohammed Sami sitting in a Dubai prison?
    Quote Originally Posted by PhoenixFire View Post
    It'd be absolutely disgusting if Asif ever steps on a cricket pitch again.
    Quote Originally Posted by social View Post
    If true (not the detention but the posession), then Asif must rank as one of the most stupid and arrogant guys on the face of the planet
    Quote Originally Posted by SJS View Post
    I also must check my wallet today. Gooey stuff tends to remain in one's wallet for months and somehow never gets noticed
    Quote Originally Posted by wellAlbidarned View Post
    There's a world of difference between an unpleasant personality and being a crooked piece of ****.
    Quote Originally Posted by Agent Nationaux View Post
    Asif the slimy piece of ****. Did not deserve the God given talent he threw away.
    Quote Originally Posted by Agent Nationaux View Post
    Asif has to be the worst person to have played international cricket.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cabinet96 View Post
    Asif is up there for the most dislikable cricketer of all time.
    Quote Originally Posted by GIMH View Post
    Asif, could have had it all

    Roy Gilchrist (West Indies)



    Crimes:

    - Used freakish fast bowling talents mostly to sate a freakish irritability
    - Profligate and deliberate use of beamers
    - Picked up a stump and hurled it at a Lancashire league batsman's head, hitting him
    - High-profile sending home by Gerry Alexander after Gilchrist allegedly pulled a knife on him
    - A few violent tendencies
    - ...culminating in branding his wife's face with an iron
    - Began coaching career by being invited by the BCCI to India to help Indian batsmen play fast bowling

    "A tragedy born of the interaction between a flawed individual and a malformed society, an almost Greek inevitability as man and system proceeded to their inevitable and final collision." - Former Jamaican prime minister Michael Manley

    "Your wife is a sympathetic woman, and more than you deserve. I hate to think English sport has sunk so far that brutes will be tolerated because they are good at games." - The judge at his domestic violence hearing[/QUOTE]

    "[The batsman] was then bombarded by chatter from the close-in fielders who told him (some apparently out of genuine concern for his well being) that he might have acted unwisely, because Gilchrist was now bound to get riled up, and by disrespecting the notoriously volatile pacer by needlessly hitting his first ball to the boundary, he might have placed his very life in jeopardy." - Garfield Robinson

    "Tales of atrocity, some perhaps arising from the proverbial tendency to give a dog a bad name, continued to emerge about his violently over-reactive attitude to batsmen and his unsparing use of the bouncer. Even charity matches were not free from his ferocious assaults." - Wisden obituary

    Quote Originally Posted by chooka_nick View Post
    Dude... Roy Gilchrist was an angry, angry man. Probably the most vicious quickie the World has ever known.
    Quote Originally Posted by Satyanash89 View Post
    Gilchrist is just despicable
    Quote Originally Posted by Autobahn View Post
    Wasn't he that West Indian nutcase that thought the beamer was a legitmate delivery, bounced people in charity games and skulled a guy with a stump during a game?
    Quote Originally Posted by andyc View Post
    Crazy *******.
    Quote Originally Posted by Bahnz View Post
    Gilchrist seems like a genuinely nasty thug.
    Quote Originally Posted by SJS View Post
    He almost killed a guy who's claim to fame was that he had the same name as me
    Quote Originally Posted by centurymaker View Post
    wow
    he always struck me as a nice guy

    edit- awwww LOOL it's some other Gilchrist. For a good couple of mins I was in disbelief.
    Last edited by LongHopCassidy; 08-04-2013 at 07:55 PM.
    "The Australian cricket captain is the Prime Minister Australia wishes it had. Steve Waugh is that man, Michael Clarke is not." - Jarrod Kimber

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  2. #812
    Dan
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    Global Moderator / Cricket Web Staff Member Dan's Avatar
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    Gilchrist.

  3. #813
    International Captain wellAlbidarned's Avatar
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    Gilchrist.
    Exit pursuing a beer

  4. #814
    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    Asif. Whenever I see pics of him as often as not he's smiling. This would seem to indicate he's either a wuckfit, doesn't care what people think or (my guess) still doesn't think he's actually done anything wrong despite an impressive body of evidence to the contrary.

    Deep down I suspect Adam's mad Uncle Roy knew he was a ****.
    Cricket Web's 2013/14 Premier League Tipping Champion

    - As featured in The Independent.

    "The committee discussed the issue of illegal bowling actions, and believed that there are a number of bowlers currently employing suspect actions in international cricket, and that the ICC's reporting and testing procedures are not adequately scrutinising these bowlers."
    - Even the ICC's own official press release thinks things must change


  5. #815
    State Vice-Captain
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    Branded his wife's face with an iron, says it all really. Gilchrist, the complete ****.

  6. #816
    International Coach morgieb's Avatar
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    Should've been the final.

    Gilchrist I suppose, but what a battle.
    5-0

    RIP Craig Walsh (Craig) 1985-2012

    Proudly supporting the #2 cricketer of all time.

  7. #817
    Eyes not spreadsheets marc71178's Avatar
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    Asif
    marc71178 - President and founding member of AAAS - we don't only appreciate when he does well, but also when he's not quite so good!

    Anyone want to join the Society?

    Beware the evils of Kit-Kats - they're immoral apparently.

  8. #818
    Request Your Custom Title Now! Flem274*'s Avatar
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    Asif is a loser, but he's not going to take out his pathetic existence on you.

    Gilchrist

    Must have made for an awkward dressing room team mate.
    Quote Originally Posted by Athlai View Post
    Jeets doesn't really deserve to be bowling.
    Quote Originally Posted by Athlai View Post
    Well yeah Tendy is probably better than Bradman, but Bradman was 70 years ago, if he grew up in the modern era he'd still easily be the best. Though he wasn't, can understand the argument for Tendy even though I don't agree.
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    RIP Craig Walsh

  9. #819
    International Coach uvelocity's Avatar
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    gilchrist
    Quote Originally Posted by sledger View Post
    I just love all kinds of balls.

  10. #820
    Cricketer Of The Year Bahnz's Avatar
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    Gilchrist, if only to avoid an all-fixer final.
    Quote Originally Posted by HeathDavisSpeed View Post
    I can think of a list of Sydney Grade posters who would contribute a better average post than Bahnz.
    Maow like no one can hear you maowing.

  11. #821
    International Coach grecian's Avatar
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    Gilchrist, I didn't bet on the no-balls.
    Do I contradict myself?
    Very well then I contradict myself,
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  12. #822
    U19 Captain burr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby View Post
    Asif. Whenever I see pics of him as often as not he's smiling. This would seem to indicate he's either a wuckfit, doesn't care what people think or (my guess) still doesn't think he's actually done anything wrong despite an impressive body of evidence to the contrary.

    Deep down I suspect Adam's mad Uncle Roy knew he was a ****.
    I don't suspect his deep levels of introspection proved particularly comforting to his disfigured wife.
    'It is hard to recall a batsman quite so serene, so unrushed, so unflappable.' Chris Ryan on ... look to the left. Ahhhh.

  13. #823
    Cricket Web Staff Member fredfertang's Avatar
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    Gilchrist

  14. #824
    Global Moderator Fusion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coronis View Post
    Branded his wife's face with an iron, says it all really. Gilchrist, the complete ****.
    Yup, Gilchrist for me as well.

  15. #825
    Cricketer Of The Year Agent Nationaux's Avatar
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    Asif is despicable but branding your wife with a hot Iron is just horrific. So Gilchrist it is for me.
    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby View Post
    Yeah, look, it gives me a pain deep inside my uterus to admit it, but it's Ajmal until such time as we get a working throwing law again.
    Never in a million years would I have thought Brumby to admit this!!!!!!

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