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Happy Jack

neville cardus

International Debutant
In the Melbourne Test of 1882, having just launched another typically categorical drive to the boundary, George Ulyett shook his bat about vigorously in front of him, took a few steps away from the wicket and then held up the offending willow for all to see. The following dialogue ensued:

"What's oop, George?"

"Ah've broken me bat!"

"Wheer's t'other?"

"At back o't'door!"

This was repeated gleefully by the crowd for the remainder of the match.
 
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wpdavid

Hall of Fame Member
I assume that that means that you can't quite grasp the Yorkshire dialect. Here's a translation:

"What's up, George?"

"I've broken my bat!"

"Where's the other?"

"At the back of the door!"
Hopefully Neville won't mind, but here's another take on this particular anecdote as posted after Nev placed it there.

And it was "repeated gleefully amongst the crowd for the remainder of
the match"!

Scene: an Australian hospital, 1882
Amputee: Gaaaah! I can't feel my leg! Where's my flaming leg!?
Amputee's father: There it is.
Amputee: No, mate! Where's the other one?
Passing nurse: At the back of the door, mate.
Amputee and amputee's father and passing nurse: LAUGHTER.

The long winter evenings must have just flown by.



Made me laugh, anyway.
 

neville cardus

International Debutant
Happy Jack was an ebullient practical joker but sometimes took it too far, as W.G. recalls:

"On the occasion of the picnic down Sydney Harbour, given to the team then in Australia, Ulyett, who went out in a small boat towed by a steamer, conceived the idea of frightening one of the gentlemen in the boat. He pretended to scuffle with the gentleman, and while doing so purposely fell overboard—a foolhardy trick, as sharks are not uncommon in those waters. George, who was a splendid swimmer, struck out for the shore, but was fished up. Then he proceeded to frighten the gentleman by accusing him of pushing him overboard and demanding compensation."
 

neville cardus

International Debutant
Yeah, I've turned up on uk.sport.cricket for some years now. It's not nearly as good as it was, so I spend more time on CW nowadays.
Compared with rec.sport.cricket, the U.K. newsgroup is utter utopia: the Henderson-v.-all battles are just priceless, outdoing tenfold my inane skirmishes with the malign cretin who inhabits R.S.C..
 
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wpdavid

Hall of Fame Member
Compared to R.S.C., the U.K. newsgroup is utter paradise. I love the Henderson-v.-everyone battles; they outdo my skirmishes with the malign fool who inhabits R.S.C. tenfold.
I've only very occasionally dipped into RSC - it's really never appealed to me at all. Oddly enough, Mike Holmans from RSC briefly appeared in CW a couple of years ago, but he didn't linger.

Henderson would be a hoot if some of his views weren't so noxious. tbf he's kept the worst of them to himself lately, but in time past he's been quite open about his leanings. Shame he didn't see fit to comment on the Youtube clip of Amiss in 1976 that I posted, but that's the nature of the man, I suppose.
 

neville cardus

International Debutant
I've only very occasionally dipped into RSC - it's really never appealed to me at all. Oddly enough, Mike Holmans from RSC briefly appeared in CW a couple of years ago, but he didn't linger.
Mike has an awesome cricketing brain; he'd've made a fine journalist. If it weren't for the likes of him, Aslam, Uday, Sdavmor, Dunford, Woggy and Dubery, I wouldn't bother either.

Henderson would be a hoot if some of his views weren't so noxious. tbf he's kept the worst of them to himself lately, but in time past he's been quite open about his leanings. Shame he didn't see fit to comment on the Youtube clip of Amiss in 1976 that I posted, but that's the nature of the man, I suppose.
His obnoxious pride is actually quite endearing in a way.
 
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cpr

International Coach
my word, usenet, thought that died a death years back! Just goes to show the old ones are the best.
 

neville cardus

International Debutant
my word, usenet, thought that died a death years back! Just goes to show the old ones are the best.
I'd hardly call Usenet "the best", mate; certainly, its most-used and -predominant cricket newsgroup, R.S.C., is at present having some massive troll problems (albeit all from the same many-faced cretin). It truly is the wild west of internet forums, but, for all the daily infighting, it's populated by some of the most knowledgeable and mind-speaking cricketing savants around.
 

PY

International Coach
I'd hardly call Usenet "the best", mate; certainly, its most-used and -predominant cricket newsgroup, R.S.C., is at present having some massive troll problems (albeit all from the same many-faced cretin). It truly is the wild west of internet forums, but, for all the daily infighting, it's populated by some of the most knowledgeable and mind-speaking cricketing savants around.
Haha, many profiles made by the same person and very irritating in each and every persona? Sounds like somewhere I know...:happy:
 

neville cardus

International Debutant
Haha, many profiles made by the same person and very irritating in each and every persona? Sounds like somewhere I know...:happy:
I doubt that the person of whom you're thinking offers you Indian slaves for ***ual favours, posts links allegedly containing bestial activities or dubs you a murderer because you admitted to killing the odd 'roach here and there.
 

neville cardus

International Debutant
From a Usenet post o'mine: "It's only to be expected that a natural-born hoodlum like Ulyett should wane markedly with age. Unfortunately, he made little or no effort to mellow as the reflexes grew slower and the joints creaked louder, and was frequently criticised -- more so, certainly, than in his prime -- for carelessness and irresponsibility.

"Time and time again, as they batted together, would Lord Hawke make clear for Ulyett the load which rested on his shoulders, prescribing caution and respect ahead of brutish belligerence. Merrily as ever, though, would Happy Jack banish the next delivery into oblivion.

"'M'Lud,' would come the nonchalant explanation as Hawke inveighed against him, "Ah feel li' 'ittin' 'em.""
 

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