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Thread: Most unlikely Test cricketers

  1. #1
    World Traveller Craig's Avatar
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    Most unlikely Test cricketers

    Barring Zimbabwe and to be cruel you would say Bangladesh, but for the purpose of this thread they don't count.

    Is there anybody who you saw and thought 'no way would they play Tests' but they did or should never have played.

    For me it is Scott Muller and Dave Bernard - a case of it doesn't matter how good or bad you might be, but who you know.
    Beware the lollipop of mediocrity. Lick once and you suck forever...

    RIP Fardin Qayyumi, a true legend of CW

    Quote Originally Posted by Boobidy View Post
    Bradman never had to face quicks like Sharma and Irfan Pathan. He wouldn't of lasted a ball against those 2, not to mention a spinner like Sehwag.

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    Hall of Fame Member Jamee999's Avatar
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    Darren Maddy.

    Great guy, solid county pro, but come on!
    Or something.

    RIP Fardin Qayyumi (AKA "cricket player"; "Bob"), 1/11/1990 - 15/4/2006

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    Cricket Web Staff Member luckyeddie's Avatar
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    Anthony McGrath, although DD had the reason, of course (unashamedly snipped from something funny):

    <Watson> "Something troubling you, Holmes?"
    <Holmes> "Not at all, Watson. Just perusing the sporting column in the Gazette."
    <Watson> "Has the squad been announced, old man?"
    <Holmes> "Yes. A few surprises, to boot. I see they've selected McGrath."
    <Watson> (horrified) "The foul-mouthed convict? The last I heard of him, he was on his way to Botany Bay in chains."
    <Holmes> "No, not Glenn, my dear stout fellow. A flat-capped, unwashed Johnny from the sticks called Anthony."
    <Watson> "By Jove, Holmes! Whatever could possess those upstanding gentlemen from Thomas Lord's neck of the woods to pick him - a - a - (gulp) Yorkshireman?"
    <Holmes> "McGrath's tedious scoring rate of late makes that of the venerable captain, Lord Nasser of Hussain, look good. Besides, it's all part of the big plan."
    <Watson> "I appreciate that the ponderous rate at which the northern oaf in question accumulates his notches hardly troubles the scorer's penknife, and even pales into insignificance in comparison to that of our esteemed leader, but what is this big plan you refer to, Holmes?"
    <Holmes> (takes long, satisfying draw on Meerschaum pipe) "The plan, Watson, that paves the way for the return of that fine gentleman of breeding Mark Ramprakash for the second test match - as replacement for said McGrath, of course."
    <Watson> "I don't understand, old bean."
    <Holmes> (dons Deerstalker hat, prepares to depart for a second breakfast at the Diogenes Club) "After this announcement, nothing emanating from the ECB will ever seem a surprise again, hence the Earl of Rampers will be able to return to the fold almost unnoticed, and what is more, without all the frightful embarrassment of riots in the streets, the burning of effigies, questions in the House and all the usual cheap tactics the hoi-polloi resort to when they disagree with authority. England will therefore become great again - a land fit for gentlemen to grow old in."
    <Watson> "Capital idea, Holmes!"
    Nigel Clough's Black and White Army, beating Forest away with 10 men

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    Soutie Langeveldt's Avatar
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    Graham Smith - one would have thought he would have struggled to get his jaw into line
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    Hall of Fame Member TT Boy's Avatar
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    Of recent times Ian Blackwell, Gavin Hamilton and Shaun Udal.
    Last edited by TT Boy; 01-04-2006 at 09:39 AM.

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    International Coach Barney Rubble's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TT Boy
    Ian Blackwell.
    I see your Ian Blackwell and raise you a Shaun Udal.

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    Hall of Fame Member TT Boy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Barney Rubble
    I see your Ian Blackwell and raise you a Shaun Udal.
    Just edited him in, thanks for the reminder.

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    International Debutant Pedro Delgado's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by luckyeddie
    <Watson> "By Jove, Holmes! Whatever could possess those upstanding gentlemen from Thomas Lord's neck of the woods to pick him - a - a - (gulp) Yorkshireman?"
    Attitudes haven't really moved on since the 1880s, apropos the Tykes.

    Quite right too, extraordinary fellows.
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    The wolves are running..

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    Global Moderator Fusion's Avatar
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    Shahid Afridi - Never thought he would have any level of success as a Test player with his batting style! He has proven me wrong. He's still maddening at times, but he deserves his place as a Test player now.

  10. #10
    Cricket Web Staff Member luckyeddie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pedro Delgado
    Attitudes haven't really moved on since the 1880s, apropos the Tykes.

    Quite right too, extraordinary fellows.
    Yes indeed.

    Interesting point that the first phrase every tight-fisted Yorkshireman is tought to say (usually by the age of 9 or 10) is "Ow much? I'm not payin' THAT!!!"

  11. #11
    State Vice-Captain Right arm fast's Avatar
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    kyle mills
    CW Red

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    Cricketer Of The Year James90's Avatar
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    Andrew Symonds.
    Stedders' Supported XI
    Tamim Iqbal, JA Burns, UT Khawaja, CA Lynn, Shakib Al Hasan, SE Marsh, +AT Carey, AC Agar, PJ Cummins, Mustafizur Rahman, JP Behrendorff.

    RIP Fardin. RIP Craigos. RIP Prince.

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    Rawl Lewis

    I am pretty sure Jack had more spinning skills as a toddler than Rawl.

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    U19 Cricketer Clarence's Avatar
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    Nathan Hauritz is up there.

  15. #15
    Request Your Custom Title Now! Mr Mxyzptlk's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Craig
    Dave Bernard - a case of it doesn't matter how good or bad you might be, but who you know.
    Dave Bernard didn't get picked because of who he knew. Rubbish. He got picked because he was identified as talented - like Dwayne Smith, Ramnaresh Sarwan and several others. He's a much better player now than he was back then.
    Sreesanth said, "Next ball he was beaten and I said, 'is this the King Charles Lara? Who is this impostor, moving around nervously? I should have kept my mouth shut for the next ball - mind you, it was a length ball - Lara just pulled it over the church beyond the boundary! He is a true legend."

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