Funny Stuff....insults, quotes etc.

[Anna]

I got The Big Book of More Sporting Insults for Christmas and I thought I'd post some of the funny cricket related things.....Only a few for now:

Shane Warne responding to the claim that he put on two stone in weight during one summer of league cricket in England: "It's simply not true: I put on close to 3 1/2 stone. I came over 81kg and was just off 100kg when I came back...I drank every night and ate absolute rubbish for six months"

Overheard at Lord's, late 1980s: "Does he have a brother called Disraeli Big?" On Gladstone Small.

Anon. journalist on Adam Gilchrist: "His appearance suggests the love-child of Martin Clunes and an elf"

 

[Anna]

Warne (again): "My diet is still pizzas, chips, toasted cheese sandwiches & milkshakes. I have the occasional six-week burst where I stick to fruit & cereal: it b****y kills me."

 

[Barney Rubble]

LOL @ the Gladstone Small one. Keep 'em coming Anna, these are good.

 

[kvemuri]

"Do you wake up in the middle of the night thinking you might have dropped the Ashes? I have got Herschelle Gibbs' phone number here if you want some counselling."
Phil Tufnell takes a dig at Shane Warne for dropping Kevin Pietersen at the Ashes decider...all this during Australia's night of nights

 

[kvemuri]

"You can fry an egg on his (Smith's) face within two minutes."
Shane Warne takes yet another dig at Graeme Smith

 

[alternative]

great stuff anna, and kvemuri.. keep it up guyzz..

 

[kvemuri]

"You might remember me ... I was captain of England when they were crap."
Former England captain Nasser Hussain's opening line at the British Asian awards

"How did you do it Mike, lets be honest you were the most boring batsman. What was your secret?"
Nasser Hussain to Mike Atherton while commenting at the first test between England and India at Nagpur.

 

[superkingdave]

bit of a poor comment by Hussain there, i mean he was pretty much as boring as atherton

 

[kvemuri]

bit of a poor comment by Hussain there, i mean he was pretty much as boring as atherton

Might have been but the comment was funny as hell.

 

[neutralguy]

Might have been but the comment was funny as hell.

Yeah sure. thats hilarious man.

 

[luckyeddie]

Ian Botham's favourite joke....

How do you make an Australian omelette?

First, steal 3 eggs...

 

[Barney Rubble]

Ian Botham's favourite joke....

How do you make an Australian omelette?

First, steal 3 eggs...

 

[33/3from3.3]

hehehehe Eggs

 

[harsh.ag]

MS Dhoni when asked how the players will ensure a clean IPL this year:
"We will try the laundry. That's good, will keep us clean."

 

[Swingpanzee]

When I grow up I wanna be Mark Richardson.

 

[GotSpin]

Holy **** that is good

 

[OverratedSanity]

How about that incident where he tried to 'practice' a slog over cow corner while running a single and ended up throwing his bat 40 feet in the air?

 

[Daemon]

Think there's a robelinda video with both incidents