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Thread: I want your Sledge Hammer

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    Cricket Web Staff Member archie mac's Avatar
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    I want your Sledge Hammer

    Not on here long, so if this has already been done happy to delete. Or maybe I have it in the wrong section?

    Just for a laugh I thought we might list some GOOD HUMOURED 'sledges'. The only rule is just one per post.

    Javed Miandad to Merve Hughes "you remind me of a fat bus conductor"

    After Hughes dismisses him, as he runs past the batsman he says to Miandad

    "tickets please"

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    International Regular King_Ponting's Avatar
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    Shane warne, even tho the camera man said it was him we all know it was warnie, to the stump mic. "Muller cant bowl, cant bat" . In the next pura cup match muller to the stump mic "5 for the match warnie". Actually thats not that funny oh well who gives a &*@#

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    Global Moderator vic_orthdox's Avatar
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    Rod Marsh to an Englishman: How's your wife and my kids?

    And then the infamous one with a West Indian batsman (there are that many versions going around about it, so I'll just put in a generic one) facing a County trundler after a massive night on the gas, and playing and missing a few times. The young upstart goes up to the batsman and says "its about three inches wide, its red and its got white stitches. Why don't you try and hit it?"

    Next ball Sobers/Viv/Lara hits the ball out of the ground, and says "You know what it looks like, go fetch it."

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    Cricket Web Staff Member archie mac's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vic_orthdox
    Rod Marsh to an Englishman: How's your wife and my kids?

    And then the infamous one with a West Indian batsman (there are that many versions going around about it, so I'll just put in a generic one) facing a County trundler after a massive night on the gas, and playing and missing a few times. The young upstart goes up to the batsman and says "its about three inches wide, its red and its got white stitches. Why don't you try and hit it?"

    Next ball Sobers/Viv/Lara hits the ball out of the ground, and says "You know what it looks like, go fetch it."
    Must be tired, read the Marsh one three times before I finally got it!


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    Hall of Fame Member FaaipDeOiad's Avatar
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    During the Lords test in the 1989 Ashes, Merv Hughes supposedly said, after beating Robin Smith's bat, "you can't ****in' bat!". Smith cracked the next ball for four, and during Merv's follow-through said "hey Merv, we make a fine pair, I can't ****in' bat and you can't ****in' bowl!".
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    International Captain LongHopCassidy's Avatar
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    Merv Hughes was staring at Viv Richards for longer than was necessary during a Test match.
    Soon, Viv piped up.
    IVAR: 'Don't you be staring at me, man. In my culture we just bowl.'
    Merv had nothing to say, until he bowled him several balls later.
    MGH: 'In my culture, it's the custom to say, "P*ss off."'
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    International Captain masterblaster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vic_orthdox
    Rod Marsh to an Englishman: How's your wife and my kids?

    And then the infamous one with a West Indian batsman (there are that many versions going around about it, so I'll just put in a generic one) facing a County trundler after a massive night on the gas, and playing and missing a few times. The young upstart goes up to the batsman and says "its about three inches wide, its red and its got white stitches. Why don't you try and hit it?"

    Next ball Sobers/Viv/Lara hits the ball out of the ground, and says "You know what it looks like, go fetch it."
    I think that second case was Ian Botham bowling to Viv Richards during the days Viv was playing County Cricket in England.
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    Global Moderator vic_orthdox's Avatar
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    I think that if you ask Ian Botham, every famous sledge was about him/by him/to him. Remember him claiming the one about Lillee, after Botham kept on playing and missing Lillee said "What about you just hold the bat still and I'll try to hit it?"

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    Eyes not spreadsheets marc71178's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by masterblaster
    I think that second case was Ian Botham bowling to Viv Richards during the days Viv was playing County Cricket in England.
    It was Greg Thomas.

    Don't think Botham ever played against Viv in County Cricket.

    If he did, I can imagine it would've been fun to watch!
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    Englishman BoyBrumby's Avatar
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    I'm sure most people have heard it before, but my favourite is a response to a sledge. Annoyed at a bit of tail-end resistance from Zimbabwe Glenn McGrath inquired of Eddo Brandes,

    "Brandes, how come you're so fat?"

    Eddo replies,

    "'Cos every time I f*ck your wife she gives me a biscuit!"
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    International Regular King_Ponting's Avatar
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    ^^^ classic mate classic

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    Cricketer Of The Year Adamc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby
    I'm sure most people have heard it before, but my favourite is a response to a sledge. Annoyed at a bit of tail-end resistance from Zimbabwe Glenn McGrath inquired of Eddo Brandes,

    "Brandes, how come you're so fat?"

    Eddo replies,

    "'Cos every time I f*ck your wife she gives me a biscuit!"
    McGrath's sledging seems to backfire quite a lot. I guess most people will be familiar with the Sarwan incident, so I needn't repeat it here.

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    U19 Vice-Captain SpeedKing's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by archie mac
    Not on here long, so if this has already been done happy to delete. Or maybe I have it in the wrong section?

    Just for a laugh I thought we might list some GOOD HUMOURED 'sledges'. The only rule is just one per post.

    Javed Miandad to Merve Hughes "you remind me of a fat bus conductor"

    After Hughes dismisses him, as he runs past the batsman he says to Miandad

    "tickets please"
    tickets ......hahahahahaha LOL. never heard that one before , good one
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    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend andyc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by marc71178
    It was Greg Thomas.

    Don't think Botham ever played against Viv in County Cricket.

    If he did, I can imagine it would've been fun to watch!
    twas indeed greg thomas. i remember viv telling us that at the shanghai sixes last year
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    Only a bunch of convicts having been beaten 3-0 and gone 9 tests without a win and won just 1 in 11 against England could go into the home series saying they will win. England will win in Australia again this winter as they are a better side which they have shown this summer. 3-0 doesn't lie girls.

  15. #15
    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend andyc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BoyBrumby
    I'm sure most people have heard it before, but my favourite is a response to a sledge. Annoyed at a bit of tail-end resistance from Zimbabwe Glenn McGrath inquired of Eddo Brandes,

    "Brandes, how come you're so fat?"

    Eddo replies,

    "'Cos every time I f*ck your wife she gives me a biscuit!"


    that one's hilarious. don't think i'd heard it before

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