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Thread: The Google Ashes

  1. #1
    Hall of Fame Member superkingdave's Avatar
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    The Google Ashes

    Now that both sides have named their Ashes squads, we can ask the really important question...which side has the most google hits?

    England

    Andrew Strauss - 471,000
    Alistair Cook - 491,000
    Both unremarkable, a professor and a magician almost as famous

    Kevin Pietersen - 897,000
    KP's 2nd favourite band, McFly, performed a song about him called 'It's all about you.' None of these hits involve KP talking about anyone else.

    Ravi Bopara
    - 361,000
    Decent total at first glance for the newcomer, but it turns out that most of these are about KP and just happen to mention Bopara.

    Paul Collingwood
    - 501,000
    Seems to be a lot more interest in him than is warranted

    Ian Bell
    - 901,000
    Suprising result, further research indicates 897,000 of these results also include the word 'sherminator'


    Matt Prior - 10,500,000
    Surely some shenanigans going on here...suspect Zaremba's involvement. Regardless, expect Flintoff and Pietersen to demand 'google parity'


    Andrew Flintoff
    - 525,000
    Yet again the results do not live up to the hype

    Stuart Broad - 466,000
    Including Stephanie Broad adds another 3.08m results

    Adil Rashid
    - 326,000
    Slightly more popular than Chris Hinton

    Graeme Swann
    - 582,000
    Less popular than his brother

    Ryan Sidebottom
    - 251,000
    Sponsored links to hair salons make up the bulk of these results

    James Anderson
    - 21,100,000
    James Anderson didn't know that James Anderson was so popular

    Graham Onions -
    717,000
    98% Involve at least 1 pun

    Monty Panesar –
    195,000
    Results for Monty Panesar + Scaly Piscine total 187,694


    Tim Bresnan – 68,100
    My ISP may have filtered out links originating from unreliable areas

    England Total 38,352,100…average 2.397m



    Australia


    Phil Hughes
    – 1,090,000
    Before he became a cricketer he was George Best’s Agent, so presumably he can sink a few

    Simon Katich
    – 111,000
    Apparently he likes to be known as Duck Blaster

    Ricky Ponting
    – 921,000
    92% also include the phrase ‘We’ll have a bowl’

    Mike Hussey
    – 366,000
    Used to have the highest number no. of hits since Headley, has slumped recently

    Michael Clarke
    - 23,100,000
    Virtual Fairs – Why Bother?, indeed

    Marcus North - 3,660,000
    There seems to be a whole town named after him, kudos.

    Shane Watson
    – 402,000
    Amongst the double glazing adverts, it seems Shane has written a handy guide for those of us looking for a man after 40

    Brad Haddin – 147,000
    Adam Gilchrist has nearly 4 times as many

    Andrew Macdonald
    – 3,690,000
    None of these hits are about him

    Mitchell Johnson 8,950,000
    For those who haven’t seen him he looks like this:



    Nathan Hauritz
    – 47,800
    Slightly lower than his bowling average

    Stuart Clark
    – 465,000
    Has his own breakfast show on Delta Radio

    Brett Lee
    – 1,720,000
    Is apparently named after a greyhound. I did not know this.

    Ben Hilfenhaus
    44,400
    Peter Siddle 94,200
    Graham Manou 47.400
    If they made a pact between them to talk about each other all the time they could boost their profiles.


    Australia total – 44855400, average 2.803 million


    So it looks like a victory for a Michael Clarke inspired Australia, England deserved underdogs for the Ashes
    Dave Mohammed >>>> You

  2. #2
    International Coach tooextracool's Avatar
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    Nicely done, looks like another victory for the convicts.
    Tendulkar = the most overated player EVER!!
    Beckham = the most overated footballer EVER!!
    Vassell = the biggest disgrace since rikki clarke!!

  3. #3
    Cricketer Of The Year four_or_six's Avatar
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    Shane Watson's a forty year old woman. I've never met a female Shane before.

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    Cricket Web Staff Member Richard's Avatar
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    Hard to tell whether this is 10% serious and 90% non-serious or 0% serious and 100% not-serious, but ITSTL either way.
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    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend Samuel_Vimes's Avatar
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    great work
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  6. #6
    Eternal Optimist / Cricket Web Staff Member GIMH's Avatar
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    dav, pure gold, are you still in BOTM?
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  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by superkingdave View Post
    Andrew Macdonald – 3,690,000
    None of these hits are about him
    There is some.

    Then again, I spelt his name correctly, you didn't.

  8. #8
    Cricket Web Staff Member Richard's Avatar
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    Kinda get the feeling that that might even have been the point dav was making. At worst very little of that post was in seriousness.

  9. #9
    Hall of Fame Member NUFAN's Avatar
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    LOL - Would love a Cricketer/sportsman to one day say "matches aren't won on google hits" instead of the usual not won on paper.

  10. #10
    Cricket Web Staff Member Richard's Avatar
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    By nature that'd work best as a typed piece rather than a soundbyte.

  11. #11
    BARNES OUT dontcloseyoureyes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by four_or_six View Post
    Shane Watson's a forty year old woman. I've never met a female Shane before.
    Shane Gould - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
    The one, the only CW Black
    Code:
    47.3 W Coppinger to Heads 
        Smacked the ball straight into the groin of Iwuajoku who has fallen over, 
        miraculously with the ball still caught in his scrotal area! Out!



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