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Thread: Jokes on them

  1. #1
    International Captain ash chaulk's Avatar
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    Jokes on them

    good jokes i got



    Q. What do Geraint Jones and Michael Jackson have in common?
    A. They both wear gloves for no apparent reason

    Q. What is the height of optimism?
    A. An English batsman applying sunscreen.

    Q. What does Ashley Giles put in his hands to make sure the next ball almost always takes a wicket? A. A bat.

    Q. What would Glen McGrath be if he was an Englishman?
    A. An allrounder.

    Q. What advantage do Kevin Pieterson, Andrew Strauss and Geraint Jones have over the rest of their team-mates? A. At least they can say they're not really English.

    Q. What is the English version of a hat-trick?
    A. Three runs in three balls.

    Q. What do you call an Englishman with 100 runs against his name? A. A bowler.

    Q. What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by English batsmen? A. The walk back to the pavilion.

    Q. Who has the easiest job in the English squad?
    A. The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats.

    Q. Why is Andrew Flintoff the unluckiest English player?
    A. Because he was born in England.

    Q. What does "Ashes" stand for?
    A. Another Sad Horrific English Series.

    Q. What's the English version of LBW?
    A. Lost, Beaten, Walloped.

    Q. Who spends the most time on the crease of anyone in the English team? A. The person who ironed the cricket whites.
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    Hall of Fame Member Johnners's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jono View Post
    Mitch Johnson is ****ing awesome for cricket.
    Quote Originally Posted by pasag View Post
    Ponting's ability to ton up in the first innings of a series should not be understated. So much pressure, so important. What a great!

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    You'll Never Walk Alone Nate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ash chaulk
    Q. What do Geraint Jones and Michael Jackson have in common?
    A. They both wear gloves for no apparent reason.

    Q. Who has the easiest job in the English squad?
    A. The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats.
    Jesus saves

    proudly supporting Liverpool FC

  4. #4
    Cricketer Of The Year Blewy's Avatar
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    Good stuff...


    Its funny cause its true...


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    Cricket Web: All-Time Legend Perm's Avatar
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    Couple of good ones in there.
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  6. #6
    Hall of Fame Member chaminda_00's Avatar
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    I got a good joke..Adam who?
    The man, the mountain, the Mathews. The greatest all rounder since Keith Miller. (Y)

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  7. #7
    You'll Never Walk Alone Nate's Avatar
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    Gilchrist. Been around for a while.

  8. #8
    International Regular shortpitched713's Avatar
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    Heard 'em all tbh, although there are some really good ones. The Michael Jackson one in particular had me .

  9. #9
    Cricketer Of The Year James90's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ash chaulk
    Q. Why is Andrew Flintoff the unluckiest English player?
    A. Because he was born in England.
    They were all a bit witty but this one
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    Quote Originally Posted by NUFAN View Post
    I think Ponting forgot to take his Swiss Ulti-Vites when he was on 99 not out.
    RIP Fardin.

  10. #10
    Global Moderator vic_orthdox's Avatar
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    Hmmm, are they the same ones trotted out when we regained the Ashes in '89?

  11. #11
    PY
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    Sounds it.

    Very witty though , we should've rolled them out in '05.
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  12. #12
    Eternal Optimist / Cricket Web Staff Member GIMH's Avatar
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    Scaly did roll them out after we won last year's Ashes...I found them one time...can't be bothered to look now though
    "It was an easy decision to sign. I could have gone elsewhere, I had calls, but it never entered my mind it's not about the money."
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  13. #13
    State Captain Tomm NCCC's Avatar
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    Very funny, now tell the ones that dont suck
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  14. #14
    You'll Never Walk Alone Nate's Avatar
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    What`s Harmison`s website?

    wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.harmison.co.uk

  15. #15
    Soutie Langeveldt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nnanden
    What`s Harmison`s website?

    wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.harmison.co.uk
    that doesn't work, w also stands for wicket
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