11 February, Pakistan v Australia, Johannesburg
Damien Martyn (Australia)
Wasim 'Timewarp' Akram, bowling like it was 1993 and not 2003, comes steaming in to the hapless Martyn, who has, from his comfy chair in the pavilion, just watched Matthew Hayden play on. "What a drongo" Damien thinks as he takes guard for his first ball. "You won't catch me doing that...tap tap tap tap ....... Ah spit!!!".
Oops! It was like watching an action replay.
<luckyeddie> Apart from the fact that one was an attacking stroke and one was a defensive one....
Identical - an action replay.
<luckyeddie>... and one was wide and one was straight....
As I said, an action replay.
<luckyeddie>... and one was short and one was full....
Yup - an action replay.
<luckyeddie> and one was a left-hander and one was a right-hander
I'm not convinced. Anyway, Damien was only out of his comfy chair for one ball - that's the point!!!
DD rating - 6 lilypads (3 really, but because it was an action replay I doubled it)
<luckyeddie> I give up - I really do!
Another action replay.
Breadcrumb moment - Waqar Younis (Pakistan)
First ball of the 49th over, Waqar steams in to Andrew Symonds - beamer!!! The centurian takes evasive action before grovelling a couple of byes off the no-ball. Ah well, accidents happen.
Second ball is in the slot, and beautifully caught by the fat old bloke in the stand.
<luckyeddie> I think you're wrong there, DD. That was in the next over when Symonds swatted Wasim into the crowd. This one was flat over long-on and just crossed the rope.
Quiet, LE. It's called 'writers privilege'
<luckyeddie> Writers privilege?
A bit like 'poetic licence'. I'm 'setting the scene'.
<luckyeddie> Yes, but you still have to be accurate.
It's never stopped you in the past. Anyway, next ball, a single. Boo, Symonds is off strike.
Next ball, Brett Lee duly obliges by skying the ball to deep midwicket. Inzy plays his part by pouching the catch - and what a pouch it is nowadays!!!
Symonds back on strike, the ball - right on the money - another beamer!!! Ah well. Accidents happen twice. A bit like running an old lady over on a zebra crossing then reversing back over her to make sure, only this is slightly funnier. Symonds is not happy. The wicket might be comfortable to play shots on, but it's not the greatest of places to have a lie down. Umpire Shep's reaction - "GET OFF!!!". Symonds said "...OFF" as well, but it wasn't "GET...".
Er, someone else (Shahid Afridi actually, but nobody cares) completes the over.
This is such a boring tournament - so many action replays.
Breadcrumb moment - Younis Khan (Pakistan)
With the scoring rate way behind the clock, Younis decides that it's time to start throwing the bat. Brad Hogg bowls him a juicy full toss, the batsman's eyes light up, the ball loops 25 yards to Ricky Ponting at midwicket and the sixth wicket falls. Damien Martyn cleverly fields the bat one-handed on the half-volley at deep backward square leg.
Breadcrumb moment - Glenn McGrath (Australia)
The game's up. With Waqar and Shoaib Akhtar at the wicket and the required run rate astronomical, Glenn McGrath is having forty winks at extra cover. Ian 'Freak' Harvey decides to roll one out of the back of his hand. Waqar, sensing a chance to get the old average up, pounces on the wide half-volley. Glenn twitches and falls full-length to his left. The ball hits his left hand and somehow ends up in his right. The jubilant Australian side walk off the pitch, leaving McGrath, unawares and still asleep, on the edge of the square.
Nigel Clough's Black and White Army, beating Forest away with 10 men
Last edited by luckyeddie; 11-02-2003 at 09:08 AM.